Jezus 

Either the lord and savior or the guy mowing your lawn

Person A: Do you know Jezus is watching you.
Person B: Yes he is mowing my lawn.

Jezus by Your friendly rebbel October 14, 2016

JEZUS 

A fine guy, caring person and always has something to entertain you with. But always gets their names mixed with “Jesus” but really doesn’t care what people call them.when you first see them you might think they are mean but when you get to know them they are probably still kinda mean but sweet. He also gets no hoes cause he’s loyal.

JEZUS is a tall handsome young man bing bong

JEZUS by Fuck yo life bing bong November 21, 2021

Jezus Tapdancing Christ 

Jesus Christ, Oh my God.

Jezus Tapdancing Christ! Did he really say that?

Jezus Tapdancing Christ by Lil-Dragon August 19, 2018

Jezus Cheetos 

A secular placeholder for the common vernacular use of "Jesus Christ", when exclaiming disdain or confusion.

"Jezus Cheetos Sonny-Jim, get a fucking grip.

Jezus Cheetos by _betamax_ June 15, 2018

Jello Jezus 

A very homo-sexual small statue of Jezus made completely out of a small, blonde, British kids jizz, which one may use for pleasuring their rectum.

"Want to go make a Jello Jezus?"
"Only if i can swallow the jizz then barf it up on to your chest"
"Great, then i'll shove it in my rectum"

Jello Jezus by Jamesnuttall April 17, 2009

lesbian jesus 

A title given to singer/actress Hayley Kiyoko by her fans

The lesbian Jesus strikes again.

lesbian jesus by Somebody’s February 13, 2018

Jesus Cheater 

A publicly devout man or woman who uses their pious reputation to aid in cheating on their partners. Can be either using the excuse of church activities or "ministering" to folk as a cover for their trysts, or making ostentatious public displays of religious contrition to rehabilitate their image after being caught.

Sue: "Wow, Bob's really involved in the Church Choir."
Sam: "Involved with 3 separate women in the choir while his wife watches the kids at home is more like it - he's such a Jesus Cheater."

OR

Sally: "After much prayer, I know that God has forgiven me for my mistakes. I'll pray that he helps you open your heart to his will and find forgiveness as well."

Sally's Husband: "Don't try that Jesus Cheater shit on me! You've been fucking that douche Bob from choir - we're getting a divorce!"

Jesus Cheater by Mai Ainsel July 25, 2021