James Mattis

With a knife hand whose casualty-kill radius spanning the known universe, the US secretary of offense will end your paltry existence with a mere glance. Noted for saying "Be polite, be professional, and have a plan to kill everyone in the room," and "Nothing keeps me awake at night, I keep other people awake at night. For him killing people is a hell of a hoot, for which he can't be blamed. The warrior monk is even rumored to be the reincarnation of good ol' chesty puller himself. There's a reason why no one has seen them in a room together.

NCOs: "Looking at James Mattis gives me the biggest wargasm since seeing the Highway of death."
Officers: "Wow what a great leader."
Boots: "OOOOORRAAHHH!!! *eats crayons*"

by Generic name here May 28, 2017

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James Mathis

One of the loudest people you'll ever meet. Has a funny way of loving someone. But has a big heart. He will be there if you ever need him. Onr of the most caring people ever. You'll know him when you see him by his big smile

But has a tiny butt....

Person 1: "There goes James Mathis"
Person 2: "He has a perfect butt"

by Sgvdhvdutv May 13, 2022

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