The time between straight relationships when you spend all of your time swooning over cute boys/girls and wishing you could go out with them.
by Silent-Warning July 03, 2010
When you grow up immersed in a culture of compulsory heterosexuality and labour under the misapprehension that you must be straight. Het lag typically lasts for years or decades.
It is particularly prevalent among those who do not experience a strong sense of romantic or sexual attraction to any sex or gender, and therefore have less obvious counter-evidence to the assumption of heterosexuality than those who experience strong same-sex/same-gender attraction. This is typically exacerbated by the lack of LGBTQIA+ education in schools and lack of awareness in many communities.
However, it is not exclusively experienced by people who identify under the asexual and/or aromantic umbrellas. Anyone whose sexuality is not the exclusively heterosexual 'default' that widespread social norms teach them to expect may experience het lag.
Originally coined in a tweet by Jared Pechacek (@vandroidhelsing):
"Mistyped it as 'het lag' so now we have a term for when you grow up thinking you're straight."
It is particularly prevalent among those who do not experience a strong sense of romantic or sexual attraction to any sex or gender, and therefore have less obvious counter-evidence to the assumption of heterosexuality than those who experience strong same-sex/same-gender attraction. This is typically exacerbated by the lack of LGBTQIA+ education in schools and lack of awareness in many communities.
However, it is not exclusively experienced by people who identify under the asexual and/or aromantic umbrellas. Anyone whose sexuality is not the exclusively heterosexual 'default' that widespread social norms teach them to expect may experience het lag.
Originally coined in a tweet by Jared Pechacek (@vandroidhelsing):
"Mistyped it as 'het lag' so now we have a term for when you grow up thinking you're straight."
by Ace_Editor April 11, 2019
by Karma Wolffe May 29, 2020
aka Hetero lag- aka heterosexual lag: when you grow up thinking you are straight but you never really know but in the back of your mind you do really know you just push it back into your mind more though.
John: im gay- BUT HET LAG EVERYDAY AMIRITE
John at 60: still gay but still het lag
Be respectful to people who don't want to come out and get out of HET lag. It takes time.
John at 60: still gay but still het lag
Be respectful to people who don't want to come out and get out of HET lag. It takes time.
by hi im ugly but really cute January 06, 2021
by King kirby May 25, 2020
That period of time, before coming out, when a gay guy tries to believe he's straight and dates girls.
I tried dating girls during my teen years but had no sexual feelings towards them. After I figured out I like men sexually, I realized I had been suffering from het lag.
by Arkansas luggage April 17, 2020
wasting too much of your life trying to force heterosexuality only to accept yourself for who you are and embrace your sexuality in the end.
"I spent the first 20 years of my life suffering from het-lag but now I'm free"
Het-lag affects 1 out of 30 adults under the age of 35 in the US due to fear of being accepted.
Het-lag affects 1 out of 30 adults under the age of 35 in the US due to fear of being accepted.
by tatsamie September 30, 2020