Pushing or punching your girlfriend's unreleased turd deep back into her bowel, with your knob, during a vigorous session of anal sex.
Doreen couldn't shit for three days after we had anal sex. I really gopher punched her good. She finally had to take and enema to get that rascal to pop its head out.
by Eaton Holgoode March 7, 2017
A sucker punch of odd circumstances. It's usually used to refer to someone who "popped out of nowhere" to hit someone. Recipients are usually stunned momentarily before the fight is over (through no act of the "gopher".) To attack someone randomly and without warning. Usually ends a fight.
Patches: *being choked by Vinni*
Vinni: *choking patches*
Mikey: *comes running up from across the street and gopher punches patches in the face, then runs off*
Vinni: What the fuck was that?!
Vinni: *choking patches*
Mikey: *comes running up from across the street and gopher punches patches in the face, then runs off*
Vinni: What the fuck was that?!
by XPup Strafe October 16, 2009
While fucking a woman, you pull your dick out and smack her ass. If your dick sees its shadow she won't get pregnant for another 6 weeks.
I figured since it was February, I would give my wife a punxsutawney gopher punch. Thankfully she isn't pregnant.
by Savory Johnson September 7, 2007
The act of repeatedly punching a prolapsed anus back into place with the strength of a thousand dying suns
by SHAZAAAM9970 July 22, 2018