Garstang Academy

The worst school in Lancashire. Lead by one strappingly handsome man who goes by the name Alistair Ashcroft. This man is a not only a Satanist but an Anarchist and has been seen practicing witchcraft and using the schools budget on fish4hoes.com. There are many famous teachers at this such as a convicted paedophile and two teachers who had an affair and probably shagged in the science prep room

Person 1: I think Garstang Academy is the worst school ever
Person 2: don’t blame you the teachers are clearly satanists

Garstang Academy by Big Man Ashcroft October 28, 2019

garstang community academy 

garstang community academy is seen as a prison and watch out lads and lasses, mr garret will be on you if you’re not careful, he’ll start messaging you and touching you up in lessons. and also mr fielden, he’ll make you bend down to pick up books or anything just to look up your skirt. oh yeah, and don’t forget how newly married mrs lakeland / mrs sugden had an affair with a teacher, mr farquaharson, who is also married and he has children. it all started on the ski trip of 2018 when they were left alone together almost every day. garstang community academy is a fantastic ‘family’ with people who wouldn’t hesitate to hit another person. it’s full of sweats and geeks and nerds. twats and bellends and freaks. boys who think they’re funny af but really they’re not. girls who will simply suck up to garret and fielden purely for attention or mr fieldens lolly pops. it’s also full of weirdos and fatties with the odd sporty freak. garstang is full of girls who simply don’t know how to do eyebrows and boys who simply don’t know when to shut there mouths. garstang has recently banned water and it’s gone so viral it’s even ended up in a magazine/ news paper in australia. not only that, probably the most decent teacher we’re ever going to get has just fucked off to another school for more money, typical of garstang really but yanno #bringbackbirch.

garstang community academy is a shit hole

garstang community academy by idgafaml April 18, 2019

Garstang Community Academy 

Garstang Community Academy is located in the north west of England. If u wanna buy weed then this is the school for you. There is loads of slags there that will flash there body’s at you for weed so watch out boys. However all the boys are manslags so they like it. All the teaches snort beak and have affairs with each. Also Everyone’s dumb there because people claim it’s a “good” school. Well it’s not

Don’t go to Garstang Community Academy that all I have to say

Garstang Community Academy by unknowntisthename June 9, 2019