Fire Islanded 

When you visit Long Island and your best friend from high school puts you on a ferry and tells you that we are going to an island where many hot foreign exchange chicks from Russia hangout. Unbeknownst of the islands true origin/nature; on the ferry ride over the sound, you notice that something is off with some of the other ferry goers. Men are holding hands. Not just one gay couple but multiples. The ferry finally touches down at a marina on the other side of the sound on Fire Island. You notice more gay couples. Then as you exit the marina into the town it is an all out flamer fest. Men are galloping briskly up and down the streets in short shorts or speedos. Finally realizing that it was a prank: you go after your best bud…He runs towards some sand dunes and you step on a hypodermic needle or rather a syringe for shooting heroin, cocaine, and/or most likely crystal meth. “Ouch that hurts”, you said. Finally you run down your best bud and beat the living snot out of him and call him a faggot. Later on after traveling back to your home in Alabama, you go in for a regular checkup and they take blood. The doctor tells you that you have contracted HIV or rather, the AIDS virus. You ask how long you have to live. The doctor tells you that your life has just begun………..Fire Islanded…..

Best Buddy from HS to a former Long Island acquaintance at Hooters restaurant:

“Yo bruh. Did you hear about what I pulled on Eric last week when I drug him up to NY because I needed the towing capacity of his Dodge Ram to get my Honda Accord into my personal auto mechanic up there?”
Acquaintance sitting on bar stool:

“Yeah, I heard he got fire islanded! Oldest trick in the book bro. Hands down.”

Hooters bartender with big fake boobs:

“Your friend sounds like one gullible person. Does he have AIDS? Is he single?”

Fire Islanded by BeAt-DoWn-InCePtIoN June 13, 2022