Explorer 500
An Inflatable Raft that you get from Wal-Mart when you don’t have dingy or tube and want to go floating or camping with your friends. It is Orange, Black, with White detailing and “Explorer 500” written on the bow of the raft. It’s pretty cheaply made. Usually purchased by the drunkest person at the camp site in a hasty fashion as the scramble out to the mountains. The user probably shouldn’t even be using it whilst so intoxicated.
Friend 1) “Hey, Man! We’re going floating at the lake today. Why don’t you come?!?”
Friend 2) “Sounds Rad! I just have to dip out too Walmart and grab a shitty Explorer 500 raft and a Cube of Pil’s”
Guy 1) “You probably shouldn’t go down that river in that shitty dingy. It’s too dangerous and you’re wasted!”
Guy 2) “Whatever, Dude! The Explorer 500 is the most solid boat ever. It’ll tackle these rapids like a Beast!”
*Guy #2’s body is found 4 days later 25 miles down stream floating face down and stuck in some brush*
Friend 2) “Sounds Rad! I just have to dip out too Walmart and grab a shitty Explorer 500 raft and a Cube of Pil’s”
Guy 1) “You probably shouldn’t go down that river in that shitty dingy. It’s too dangerous and you’re wasted!”
Guy 2) “Whatever, Dude! The Explorer 500 is the most solid boat ever. It’ll tackle these rapids like a Beast!”
*Guy #2’s body is found 4 days later 25 miles down stream floating face down and stuck in some brush*
Explorer 500 by thebirdbrand May 31, 2021
