Being in the process of becoming a dark sider. An art only possible at a federal academy. Sleeping and or having a relationship with a female academy attendee is dark siding. The occurrence is due to someone no longer being able to go without getting any, often times it is safer to sleep with your own hand. Correction it is always safer to sleep with ones own hand.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.