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Cuckcumber

The unfortunate state of having a micro-penis whereas one's girlfriend prefers to use a cucumber as a dildo.
"Wow I wish I could have sex with my girlfriend, but she has made me into a cuckcumber. I am not envious of all cucumbers"
by zeezer43 June 26, 2021
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Cucksumerism

A new, alienating form of consumerism where you purchase a product and send it to someone else to use instead of you.

Coined by the Youtubers 'Boy Boy' in a video where they explain why people buy Pokémon cards and pay Logan Paul to open them on their behalf.
A - "I just watched a 2 hour long twitchstream of a guy playing with my toys instead of me"
B - "Dude, that sounds like Cucksumerism..."
A - "I'm so very lonely"
by Boy Boy Youtube September 16, 2021
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Greasy Cucumber

When a bromance reaches an uncomfortable and an irreversible level.
~ Long, Slimey, and Green
Look at those two greasy cucumbers over there.

Lets play hide the greasy cucumber.
by THE Greasy Cucumber February 18, 2017
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cumcumber

The sex toy version of the cucumber. The dildo of choice for those vegetable-loving ladies who during “man-drought” prefer to slake their libidinous thirst not with a banana, but rather with the cooler and considerably more dilatory cucumber.
She could hardly get to the vegetable compartment fast enough, such was the urge to pleasure herself. There it was - 8 inches of thickest greenest cumcumber. She returned to her bed. She peeled down its plastic wrap from the blunt tip and removed it. She lay back and hiked up her shirt. This was going to be one of those nights!
by Epigenie1 December 18, 2009
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Cucumber Thunder

The sexual noise created when the man's nuts simultaneously 'slap' the receiver's (male or female) ass cheeks.
Man my neighbor was really going at it last night, I could hear the cucumber thunder from across the floor.
by DNW... December 11, 2012
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cucumber satan

FRIKKIN SATANS INCARNATION IN THE FORM OF A CUCUMBER-HAIRED 6 YEAR OLD (aka Monaca Towa from the game "Danganronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls")
Person 1: Who's your favorite Danganronpa character?

Person 2: hmm...I really like Monaca Towa

Person 1: Aw man really?! I freaking hate that cucumber satan!!
by Rantarouamami February 17, 2017
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