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crank the hog 

The most aggressive style of masturbating your chode, resulting from one not getting laid.
Yea boys, sorry I'm late. My girl was being a bitch and told me she flicked her bean earlier...So I had a crank the hog.
Words you can keep

Crank The Hog 

Masturbating aggressively, often times in a corporate setting
“I mean hey man, I don’t have a real job so what else am I gonna do other than crank the hog for 2 hours in the bathroom?” - Gebge
Crank The Hog by anonymous June 16, 2025

Crank the Hog

Passing up sex from your partner and telling her you’re going for a wank in the bathroom and not to come in. Also known as the Mitchell Adams
My Mrs was pissing me off so I so I decided to crank the hog instead
Crank the Hog by ILoveCracky January 9, 2026
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Lookie at these bunch of narps, NARP NARP NARP
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