Cancún Ted

"Cancun Ted" refers to the sleazy U.S. Senator from Texas, who in February 2021 took his family on vacation to Cancun, Mexico, while a severe winter storm left millions of his constituents in Texas without power, heat, and water.

When the going gets tough, you can count on Cancún Ted Cruz not to be there for his constituents. Instead, he will be on a beach in Mexico sipping a piña colada.

by LaughingAloud January 18, 2026

Ted Cruz Cancun Trip

A unit of measure equivalent to 3" that represents the amount of snow Texas received before Ted Cruz fled to Mexico.

Girl 1: How was your dick appointment yesterday?
Girl 2: Terrible, he had a micro peen.
Girl 1: Like Ted Cruz Cancun Trip??
Girl 2: Smaller...

by Nuclear Grade February 22, 2021