Beef Monster
A (usually male) individual who lifts weights and/or uses steroids (juice) to attain a grotesque, reddened, mesomorphic physical state, which they accentuate by wearing tiny tank-tops and grim, constipated expressions.
The natural habitat of the Beef Monster is a gym, where they can be seen powerlifting and basking in each other's sweaty auras while consuming protein shakes.
Beef Monsters are also sometimes seen walking on seaside boardwalks or strolling down beaches, displaying their vein-y, leathery exteriors. However, Beef Monsters rarely enter in the water, as their overdeveloped musculature renders them poor swimmers.
A Beef Monster is a more extreme version of a beefcake, the difference being that while a beefcake can be found attractive by straight women (and gay men) who prefer muscle-y males, Beef Monsters have long since passed the point of reasonable buffness and are now demonstrably horrifying in their over-muscled appearance.
Beef Monsters are objects of disgust to everyone except other Beef Monsters, with whom they share a mutual non-sexual attraction due to their reciprocal monstrosity.
Beef Monsters should not be confused with competitive bodybuilders who, while unattractive/disturbing to many, have substantially less bodyfat, and a much less social attitude towards exercise, due to the rigors of competition.
The natural habitat of the Beef Monster is a gym, where they can be seen powerlifting and basking in each other's sweaty auras while consuming protein shakes.
Beef Monsters are also sometimes seen walking on seaside boardwalks or strolling down beaches, displaying their vein-y, leathery exteriors. However, Beef Monsters rarely enter in the water, as their overdeveloped musculature renders them poor swimmers.
A Beef Monster is a more extreme version of a beefcake, the difference being that while a beefcake can be found attractive by straight women (and gay men) who prefer muscle-y males, Beef Monsters have long since passed the point of reasonable buffness and are now demonstrably horrifying in their over-muscled appearance.
Beef Monsters are objects of disgust to everyone except other Beef Monsters, with whom they share a mutual non-sexual attraction due to their reciprocal monstrosity.
Beef Monsters should not be confused with competitive bodybuilders who, while unattractive/disturbing to many, have substantially less bodyfat, and a much less social attitude towards exercise, due to the rigors of competition.
"The weight area at my gym is full of Beef Monsters!"
"You never see just one Beef Monster, they seem to travel in twos or threes."
Girl A: "...and this guy was really cut?"
Girl B: "No, he was way beyond "cut." He was all red and inflated, really abnormal. A total Beef Monster."
Girl A: "I am disgusted."
"You never see just one Beef Monster, they seem to travel in twos or threes."
Girl A: "...and this guy was really cut?"
Girl B: "No, he was way beyond "cut." He was all red and inflated, really abnormal. A total Beef Monster."
Girl A: "I am disgusted."
Beef Monster by OldBay March 13, 2009
