Auntie Christ
(as in antichrist)
When you're an 8 year old wee laddie and your Aunt Jen sues your wee bitty arse for allegedly sustaining two broken wrists altering falling over from your side hug on your birthday and in your own home.
And because Aunt Jen is a total attention whore, decides to trot your now 12 year old, not so wee bitty arse, out on national tee-vee in hopes to snag her own reality show.... allegedly. That twunt!
When your dad's omeowners insurance offered to pay auntie 1$ for her alleged injuries, she decided to take your "so-over-this" arse to court. But luckily the jurors saw through her conniving ru$e and awarded her a big, fat nopenopenope.
Aunt Jen should just fill out an application to be Satan's ambassador already.
When you're an 8 year old wee laddie and your Aunt Jen sues your wee bitty arse for allegedly sustaining two broken wrists altering falling over from your side hug on your birthday and in your own home.
And because Aunt Jen is a total attention whore, decides to trot your now 12 year old, not so wee bitty arse, out on national tee-vee in hopes to snag her own reality show.... allegedly. That twunt!
When your dad's omeowners insurance offered to pay auntie 1$ for her alleged injuries, she decided to take your "so-over-this" arse to court. But luckily the jurors saw through her conniving ru$e and awarded her a big, fat nopenopenope.
Aunt Jen should just fill out an application to be Satan's ambassador already.
When you offer to take Auntie Christ out to a lavish dinner at McDonald's and her reaction when she discovers that they're all out of Mcnuggets would make a no-hearted, no effs to give Satan cower in the closet.
Auntie Christ by Cevyn Injekkt December 8, 2015
