ass patrol

when the local police squad spends more time looking for women than actual criminals.

Chelsea: "I can't believe it, I got pulled over the other day outside of the Kirk Hotel"
Pete Dick: "Woa, what did you do?"
Chelsea: "I was driving 55 in a 30 with no license plates, oh and I was driving down the wrong side of the street with no lights on and it was night time, think I blew past a couple stop signs and had "Fuck the Police" on the radio."
Pete Dick: "You must have gotten at least five tickets."
Chelsea: "Not a single one, I am so lucky!"
Pete Dick: "Lucky??? That cop was obviously just on ass patrol."
Chelsea: "You think?"
Pete Dick: "Yes, he was jacking for beats"
Chelsea: "Wow"

ass patrol by Pete Dick March 15, 2008

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ass hole patrol

a derogative name for the police.

The ass hole patrol stoped me for speeding last night while I was taking my mother to the hospital after she had a heart attack.

ass hole patrol by Deep Blue 2012 July 8, 2009

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Related Words

ass patrol • ass hole patrol • ass • ass pirate • ass crack • ass rape • ass butt • ass blaster • ass water • ass cakes

bang a you-ee

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"

hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee

bang a you-ee by Pistolero Pierro May 4, 2008

Word of the Day on July 19, 2026

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Fleg

The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.

"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"

Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013

Word of the Day on July 18, 2026

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Skeef

To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.

"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."

Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026

Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

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Hair spider

A tight, tangled knot of loose hair and lint that forms inside clothing during the clothes dryer cycle. It typically hides inside garments, causing an annoying lump or a phantom tickling sensation against the skin until it is found or falls out onto the floor during folding.

I was folding my clothes and a huge hair spider fell out onto my hand

Hair spider by Kmorsels July 15, 2026

Word of the Day on July 16, 2026

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bullshot

n. A screenshot fabricated by a company to misrepresent the graphics of a game; a combination of the words bullshit and screenshot.

Originated from Penny Arcade, a popular gaming webcomic.

-Have you seen Madden 2006 for the Xbox 360? The graphics are gonna be awesome!
-Dude, the Madden 2006 images they showed at E3 were bullshots. It doesn't look nearly as good as they said.

bullshot by Worker Unit #503,298,545 September 26, 2005

Word of the Day on July 15, 2026

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