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Mutton dressed as ham 

An alternative to mutton dressed as pig which means the same thing - old, usually fat, unattractive women all tarted up and looking repulsive.
"I went to ladies night at the working mens club on the weekend... there was some mutton dressed as ham I can tell you!"

Jewish man wearing a traffic cone on his head while beating his meat naked on the side of the street of downtown LA while 6 to 8 members of the local Mosque watch as he then proceeds to smother ham all over his penis. 

A Jewish man wearing a traffic cone on his head while beating his meat naked on the side of the street of downtown LA while 6 to 8 members of the local Mosque watch as he then proceeds to smother ham all over his penis is basically a Jewish man who wears a traffic cone; generally used in road work and diverting traffic, on his head which is the uppermost region of the human body. Whilst he masturbates his penis on the side of a Downtown LA street while 6 to 8 Muslims from the local mosque watch him smother ham on his penis
Jew 1: did you hear that Jewish man wearing a traffic cone on his head while beating his meat naked on the side of the street of downtown LA while 6 to 8 members of the local Mosque watch as he then proceeds to smother ham all over his penis.
Jew 2: No.

dumb as a bag of hammers 

adjectival clause describing someone who is superbly stupid
My neighbour's as dumb as a bag of hammers - he's trying to change his tires without a jack.
If someone is being called Ashams SA by another person its to encourage them and make them know they are awesome.
Hey you are strong as an Ashams SA.
Or
Ni oru Ashams thanne
Ashams SA by Ashams SA November 24, 2021
How you feel after you masturbate.
"You should be ashamed of yourself, young man!"-Your mom
ashamed by cccccombobreaker June 10, 2013

Ashamed List 

When you hit a girl and she is a butter face, she gets added to your ashamed list. Nobody ever talks about their ashamed list, they just get made fun of by their friends for it.
After nailing 18 Cheeseburger Ass, Barry added another tick to his already lengthy ashamed list.
Ashamed List by Lazynutz July 4, 2005
More from Urban Dictionary

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
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