Skip to main content

America's History 

A sexual act that requires great finesse and patriotism. It is between a man and a woman, starting with foreplay, representing the founding of Jamestown. This will lead to the arrival of Pilgrims who celebrate the first Thanksgiving, symbolized through the man feasting on the woman's vagina. The man will then "cross the Delaware" by switching from her vagina to her anus, representing the War for Independence. Next is the signing of the Declaration of Independence, signed by John Handcock and fifty-five others. The woman will give the man a hand job, or a blowjob depending on preference. Next the settlement of the West, bringing cowboys and gold mining to America. This is symbolized through the cowgirl/reverse cowgirl position. After this would be the Civil War, in which the couple will engage in doggy style, vaginal for the North and anal for the South. Next is the the Prohibition Act, which is represented by the couple drinking a variety of alcohol, potentially from the oral, naval, or anal cavities. Following would be the baby boom, post-WWII, represented by the most popular sex position, missionary. This leads to America putting the first man on the moon in 1969, which will require the couple to engage in the sixty-nine position. This will end with the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991, leaving America as the only superpower in the world, symbolized by the man ejaculating onto the woman's face - a sign of dominance.
America's History by May de Flower November 10, 2017
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

Prices in USD. Free US shipping. International shipping and regional book fees are shown before payment.

America's History 

Is the best history on the planet. In less than 300 years from becoming it's own country America has done so much stuff that it makes country like England want to commit suicide. This History contains winning wars over and over again. Inventing the most useful inventions known to man. Becoming a world super power and more.

Also one man who will go down in American History as we know it will be Stephen Colbert. And to protect his legacy we must make sure that those evil Canadians don't make lies about this word. So make sure that we fill this definition with as much positive American stuff as we can!!
In preparation for a counter attack from Canadians I have told about the TRUE definition for America's History.
America's History by PrinceDNA February 6, 2010

America's History 

america is to the World what terell owens is to Football, what sean avery is to Hockey, what kayne west is to Music Industry, that's right, the Planet would be a much better place without all of the aforementioned, particularly, without the usa.
America's History can be summed up in the same manner Stephan Colbert summed up Sarah Palin..."Fucking Retarded".
America's History by pseudonamous February 11, 2010

Americas History 

A long and epic tale of deceitful hermits, terrorism, a new messiah, and beer. With many characters including bush the retarded president. Mr. Fucker, bushes dad. And Melvin K Fuck
Hey, did you hear about americas history? It's pretty shitty
More from Urban Dictionary
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
Literally "dirty" pronounced with a West Indian accent. Can also have a positive connotation, for example Sean Paul's album title "Dutty Rock".
"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
Word of the Day on October 1, 2026
Load more