Skip to main content

you've got 2 options

An expression basically meant to tell someone to shut up. Actually means that the listener has 2 options: Shut the hell up or suck on your genitalia.
person A: fuck your couch, nigger
person B: You've got 2 options.
by Jonny Jewsalot March 7, 2004
mugGet the you've got 2 options mug.

optimist

Someone who lacks rational thinking or the understanding of Occam's Razor.
-Hey, check it out. Bob's mom just died, and he's confident she went to heaven.
-Nah, he's just an optimist.
by TheShameless May 29, 2009
mugGet the optimist mug.

optimistic dab

When a male urinates, then proceeds to dab the tip of his penis with a single square of toilet paper or something akin to a baby-wipe.

This ritual is a crude, but slightly considerate, attempt at hygiene when the male is optimistic about receiving fellatio in the near future. Usually occurs when sex appears imminent but the male must excuse himself in order to urinate.

The optimistic dab, while very similar to a full solar-eclipse in the fact that it is rarely seen, only becomes in evident in one of two common situations:

1. The male and his sexual partner reside in the same residence and the aforementioned male fails to know properly operate the bathroom door while urinating

2. When the male is beginning to receive fellatio and the female, while flicking her tongue across the head of his penis, realizes her partner's cock tastes like a wet-nap one receives in a BBQ restaurant. Thanks.
"Why are you wiping instead of shaking? Oh. Wait. Is that an optimistic dab? How cute."

Alternatively,

"Darling, your cock tastes like soap. Mind using something other than a wet-nap next time you do an optimistic dab?"
by twittish July 10, 2009
mugGet the optimistic dab mug.

optimista

is an outlook on life with a Latin twist. One maintains a view of the world as a positive place.

Opposite:
Pessimista
Tia was being optimista that she would find the perfect dress for her sister's wedding
by Tia&Chele April 22, 2008
mugGet the optimista mug.

Optimist

A kind of person who is most often a closet pessimist, and much like a pessimist can not see the virtue or value in any bad experiences. However, unlike a pessimist, who copes with that view by adopting the deluded, jaded notion that everything that can go wrong will go wrong so they aren't disappointed, the optimist follows the even more deluded notion that they will simply never have bad experiences.
Optimist: There's no way we're going to lose!
Pessimist: There's no way we will win...let's just quit while we're ahead...
Realist: I would honestly prefer to win, but it's also no biggie if we lose. Live and learn, right?
Optimist and Pessimist: ...Get out.
by BovineButthole October 19, 2017
mugGet the Optimist mug.

Cynically optimistic

When you're really negative about something you're actually looking forward to.
Marriage is the biggest mistake I can't wait to make. It's the only thing I've ever been cynically optimistic about.
by Sanityfan November 29, 2015
mugGet the Cynically optimistic mug.

weighing his options

When a guy or girl looks at the two (2) people they want to go out with, and chooses between the two by figuring out each persons pluses and minuses.
Jimmy is choosing between Wanda and Katie by weighing his options.
by Peter fishermanshire July 6, 2007
mugGet the weighing his options mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email