by zero social skills October 08, 2015
When a male urinates, then proceeds to dab the tip of his penis with a single square of toilet paper or something akin to a baby-wipe.
This ritual is a crude, but slightly considerate, attempt at hygiene when the male is optimistic about receiving fellatio in the near future. Usually occurs when sex appears imminent but the male must excuse himself in order to urinate.
The optimistic dab, while very similar to a full solar-eclipse in the fact that it is rarely seen, only becomes in evident in one of two common situations:
1. The male and his sexual partner reside in the same residence and the aforementioned male fails to know properly operate the bathroom door while urinating
2. When the male is beginning to receive fellatio and the female, while flicking her tongue across the head of his penis, realizes her partner's cock tastes like a wet-nap one receives in a BBQ restaurant. Thanks.
This ritual is a crude, but slightly considerate, attempt at hygiene when the male is optimistic about receiving fellatio in the near future. Usually occurs when sex appears imminent but the male must excuse himself in order to urinate.
The optimistic dab, while very similar to a full solar-eclipse in the fact that it is rarely seen, only becomes in evident in one of two common situations:
1. The male and his sexual partner reside in the same residence and the aforementioned male fails to know properly operate the bathroom door while urinating
2. When the male is beginning to receive fellatio and the female, while flicking her tongue across the head of his penis, realizes her partner's cock tastes like a wet-nap one receives in a BBQ restaurant. Thanks.
"Why are you wiping instead of shaking? Oh. Wait. Is that an optimistic dab? How cute."
Alternatively,
"Darling, your cock tastes like soap. Mind using something other than a wet-nap next time you do an optimistic dab?"
Alternatively,
"Darling, your cock tastes like soap. Mind using something other than a wet-nap next time you do an optimistic dab?"
by twittish July 11, 2009
Marriage is the biggest mistake I can't wait to make. It's the only thing I've ever been cynically optimistic about.
by Sanityfan October 10, 2015
The opposite of a smart shopper. One who tends to spend their money frequently using their optimistic senses.
I buy a lot of different things because I am an optimistic shopper, and frankly I'm quite proud of it.
by Whatsup123 April 25, 2011
Nickname for someone who is constantly optimistic and seeing the bright side of things, the glass half full, and forces her happiness and optimism onto others.
by missnegative December 07, 2010
A person who is optimistic about everything beyond logic and reason. The optimism level of this person surpasses reason and is a way to see everything as glass full.
Man his girlfriend left him for a rich guy, but he still thinks he gonna get her back. He's a proper delusional optimistic
by Manavtbitw January 20, 2021
A euphemistic (yet silly) way of saying "worried". Most often said by those on national news networks.
by Smkngmgc June 16, 2004