maltese

Eeyore Puppybutt Esq. is a Maltese. He is a friendly little dog who weighs about 5 lbs and lives in Tampa, FL with his human parents. Eeyore Puppybutt got his law degree within his first year of life, making him quite a unique specimen of the Maltese breed. He loves to give kisses and of course, litigation advice.

"Eeyore Puppbutt Esq. you are mommies little baby Maltese, yes you are, Mommy loves you very much"

Eeyore, since mommy got arrested at the PETA rally she is going to need your legal help, now be a good Maltese and come and bail mommy out of jail.

by Eeyores Mom May 4, 2006

maltese dog

A small, incredibly yappy dog worthy of nothing less than a sharp boot to it's scrunched-up face, luckily sending the little bundle of white matted hair flying incredibly far in a parabolic fashion. Hopefully, a mulcher will be comically positioned at the falling point with the feeding-tube pointing up. It must also be switched on. Thereafter, observe peaceful silence. The maltese dog is an unnatural deviation and is an affront to the Gods.

Person1: what's that bitchy high pitched yapping?

Person2: That'd be the little bitchyap next door - it's a maltese dog

by Maximilian XV April 6, 2007

Maltese

I little white dog that may sometimes be cute.. but are most of the time hideously ugly, with matted fur and gunky brown crap around it's eyes.... mostly on the behalf of neglect on its owners part. These dogs will shit and piss your house up no matter what kind of training you subject them to. They bark without a moment of pausing, and practically jump on your plate when you are trying to eat dinner.
These dogs are about as useless as they come.. the only thing that they are good for is snake food.

Omg.. did you see that stupid maltese, it was so ugly I wanted to scratch my own eyes out!

by fritoburrito July 16, 2010

Malteser

The act of squishing one's balls into another's poohole whilst copulating

"hey, I know we've just met but can I stick my nuts in your ringpiece? What you don't know what thats called....Why in cosmopolitain circles its called a malteser"

by Malteser May 9, 2006

maltesers

Inserting the penis far enough into the anus so that the testicles push up against the outside of the sphincter and are coated with brown feces.

That dumb slut had a taste of my maltesers after anal last night!

by Wikc June 16, 2011

mateshit

all your flat mate's belongings, strewn around the floor.

Guy 1: nice place you got here

Guy 2: yeah, if you look pat all the mateshit all over the floor

by bennnyyyyyy January 23, 2009

The Malteser

This is the process in which one day you eat plenty of hot food, then the following day you have a hot bath to make your balls saggy, fill the toilet with toilet paper and then have a shit. You then flush the toilet and because of the toilet paper blocking it, the poo rises and surrounds your ball sack making it look like a malteser.

John: "Why are you eating so much curry Steve"
Steve: "I'm preparing to do The Malteser tomorrow"

by Pooeychooeylooey November 19, 2016