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Dutch Crunch

A Dutch Crunch is a sexual act in which the female slams her buttocks upon the males testicles before he is about to climax.
Nicolas: man! I don’t know if I’ll ever reproduce!

Kyle: What happened bro?

Nicolas: Dude! Last night Cynthia gave me the ol’ dutch crunch. Totally rocked my world.

Kyle: You’re a freak bro.....
by DirtSquizzeral September 1, 2018
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Dutch Landlord

Similar to a dutch oven, but occurring during the act of fellatio. A slang term for lying in bed with another person and pulling the covers over the persons head while receiving fellatio and flatulating.
She couldn't come up with her half of the rent so I'm gonna introduce her to the Dutch Landlord...
I really want to give Rosemary a Dutch Landlord...
by contorto January 30, 2021
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Related Words
Dutch Dutch oven DUTS Dutty dutchie Dutt Dutch Rudder duterte Dute duty

duttbust

duttbust is my best friend and he make capuchin vr for everyone to play together, he so nice, oh my gosh
duttbust is so cool
by chasesolos January 5, 2023
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shore duty problems

The US Navy's version of white girl problems. A shore duty problem is only a problem because you work in an office building at a slack-ass fleet support job, and life is good. Shore duty problems are commonly experienced by sailors who have not been assigned to a ship in a long time, and consequently have their threshold for flipping their shit grossly miscalibrated. Those who have spent some time on sea duty know what actual problems are, and are much less likely to go ape-shit over such trivial annoyances.
Shore duty problems may include:

-"Powerpoint froze before I saved my work and now I have to reopen it and spend 10 minutes entering this data all over again! AAAAAAAGH! I'm going to bludgeon everyone in this fucking office to death with my three-hole punch!"
-"We're not allowed to watch YouTube videos at work anymore?! GRRRAAAAGH! This is worse than being raped in the mouth! I'm going to break my keyboard in half and then strangle your children with my mouse cord!"

In comparison to common sea duty problems, which are actually worth freaking out over:
-"Toxic hydrogen sulfide gas is leaking into my berthing."
-"The sewage system is broken and I am covered in liquified human excrement while trying to fix it."
-"I am literally on fire/being electrocuted/getting shot at by Somali pirates right now."
by onshoreduty November 1, 2011
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Sneaky Dutchman

The act of farting in bed, then sneaking out the covers turning on the bedroom lights so the sleeping partner pulls the covers over thier head giving themselves a Dutch Oven
As I left for work I let Shelley with a Sneaky Dutchman
by Maddog sick cunt August 10, 2017
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rich man's dutch oven

when one sticks ones buttocks in the limo cab, farts and then rolls up the privacy screen.
At my bachelor party, all the guys thought it was funny to give the limo driver a rich man's dutch oven.
by just just kidding January 17, 2011
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dutchie

a BLUNT rolled with the wrapper of a dutchmaster cigar.
hey, man, you gonna smoke that whole dutchie or you gonna pass it my way?
by Pyair October 1, 2005
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