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Cripto

Updating your social networking profile with a cryptic/enigmatic statement that suggests you may be experiencing some distress.

Usually this is followed by a concerned friend publicly quizzing you as to the nature of your anguish, to which you reply " I don't want to talk about it on here!"
Cripto Level One: " :( "
Cripto Level Two:: "Meh?"
Cripto Level Three: "Why me?"
Cripto Level Four: "Why do people treat me like this?"
Cripto Level Five: "You'll miss me when I'm gone!"
by ginga-ninja78 August 21, 2010
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crippling depreston

When your name is Preston and you can't escape the puns of your name so it actually puts you in a state of depression
Wow Preston! You seem sad. Do you have "Crippling Depreston?"
by Cereal Guy November 16, 2016
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Related Words

cripple song

A strange phrase heard in the song Shapeshift by Horse The Band, an awesome metal group. In the song, the protagonist is asked by his girlfriend to "sing the cripple song" with her, which scares him off. Therefore, Cripple Song probably refers to marriage, sex,or a long term relationship, which the protagonist wants no part of. So he leaves her. In this sense, singing the cripple song, in real life, can refer to any task which one would rather avoid, such as working, paying bills, or visiting in-laws.
You should have seen her, at one with the Gods.

She said "let's sing the Cripple Song".

Then i was gone.

Oh dear, oh dear. Then i was gone.

She said " let's sing the Cripple Song together".

Then i was gone.
by KrispyDymond December 18, 2017
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Crippled wank

Someone who wanks off without arms and legs
Katy Jones is a crippled wank
by Niscaraeperuscar May 13, 2019
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Brandon Cripps

Full name for the swaggiest of the swaggy. A man who enjoys long walks on the beach and ducking at video games (Namely PubG). He tries very hard but never quite achieves the chicken dinner. He is often sighted with his notorious pal Mr. Nosleeves. But I can't state fully enough.. how bad he is at video games! Its bad. Like, bad.
Wow Im really pulling a Brandon Cripps and sucking balls at this game right now.
by Steve Boshman December 27, 2018
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Jeepers Cripes

Praise Jeepers or you'll be darned to Heck!
by ... June 8, 2004
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crips

the gang formed by timmy and jimmy on south park
s-s-s-ay guys,w-w-w-want t-t-t-t-to come d-d-d-d-down toooo th-th-th-the r-r-reck center
by tim December 3, 2004
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