KrispyDymond's definitions

ice god of hungary

The only song by the (fictional) band Glitter Job. The beginning of the song was originally used for part of the Bad Lip Reading parody of Stranger Things. However , a full version was later recorded and made available on YouTube and ITunes. While some of the lyrics are admittedly nonsensical, it is still an awesome song, with cool beats, and awesome vocals.

The guy that sat on his potato put his socks around his neck.

Even I would touch the junk.

It was a dog who bit me for the burger meat.

I got bit.

Gotta find my sticks.

Frightened nipple, frightened nipple.

The Ice God Of Hungary sailed across the sea

to become a deity.

And while the doctor played his flute,

The captain sailed his crew through the Strait of Avalon.

by KrispyDymond January 2, 2018

faptality

Death by masturbation. Basically, fapping so hard you die. Most common in older men with erectile disfunction, who have a hard time getting, and keeping, it up, making them have to jerk harder, thus increasing the heartbeat, often resulting in a heart attack. Faptality, in a broader sense, can refer to ANY fap-related mishap, such as autoerotic asphyxiation gone wrong.

Tim: "Hey did you hear what happened to Blake? He was watching Japanese porn, and nutted so hard, his balls exploded and he had a heart attack!!!"
Nelson: " Wow, not THAT is a faptality!!!"

by KrispyDymond November 28, 2018

stan against evil

A show on the channel IFC, starring John C McGinley as the title character, a disgruntled and curmudgeonly ex-sheriff who must defend himself and his town from demonic forces his recently deceased wife spent decades keeping at bay. With the help of the new sheriff, the sexy and badass Evie Barret, and his eccentric daughter Denise, Stan battles witches, demons, ghosts, evil flowers, succubus babies, and wereponies. That is, when he can be bothered to get off the couch. This show is often compared to Ash Vs Evil Dead, because of the similar premise, and humor, but is much tamer and less graphic. But is nonetheless hilarious, with so many hilarious quotes and one-liners you'd have to watch every episode three times to catch them all. You REALLY must watch it!!!

Dude 1: Man, it sucks that Ash Vs Evil Dead got cancelled.

Dude 2: Check out Stan Against Evil. It's just as good. Actually better in some ways. Last night's episode had Simon from The Walking Dead as the Werepony.

Dude 1: Werepony?!! What the hell is that??!

Dude 2: Just watch and see!!

by KrispyDymond October 31, 2018

Neart

A neart is technically a fart, but in proximity, or near, other people. A fart is arguably ONLY a fart if it is done by oneself, or FAR, from other people, thus the "far" in fart. To be a neart, the person must pass gas in the vicinity of others, and at least one must be able to smell it, to deem it a true neart.

Tony was late to work, stuck in the dinky old elevator, listening to that stupid elevator music. To make matters worse, the fat dude next to him let loose a loud, smelly, room-shaking neart.

by KrispyDymond November 1, 2018

peepkour

As seen in the Netflix series Big Mouth, peepkour is a game mixing parkour with peeping tomfoolery. The goal is to perform acrobatic feats, while discreetly observing neighbors in a voyeuristic manner, catching them in acts such as changing clothes, showering, masturbating, or having sex.

After explaining to his friends the rules of peepkour, Jay vaulted over the obstacles in his backyard, then jumped on the trampoline, allowing him to see into the window of his neighbors, who were having sex. He got extra points because he saw both of their buttholes.

by KrispyDymond November 2, 2018

retardical question

A play on the phrase rhetorical question, a retardical question is a question so stupid, it leaves the people being asked speechless, and unable to answer with even a sarcastic response. A retardical question has such stupefying power,it can leave an entire room in a confused daze, and, in written form, can kill as many brain cells as aerosol or a Miley Cyrus song.

Dude 1: What did you put in answer for number 9?

Dude 2: You mean "name something flat? I put pancakes, tortillas, Earth....
Dude 1: Wait what?! Earth?
Dude 2: Yeah it's flat right? That's what people say.

Dude 1 is so stunned by this retardical question he is unable to speak, or move, and has to be taken to the school nurse.

by KrispyDymond February 4, 2018

cripple song

A strange phrase heard in the song Shapeshift by Horse The Band, an awesome metal group. In the song, the protagonist is asked by his girlfriend to "sing the cripple song" with her, which scares him off. Therefore, Cripple Song probably refers to marriage, sex,or a long term relationship, which the protagonist wants no part of. So he leaves her. In this sense, singing the cripple song, in real life, can refer to any task which one would rather avoid, such as working, paying bills, or visiting in-laws.

You should have seen her, at one with the Gods.

She said "let's sing the Cripple Song".

Then i was gone.

Oh dear, oh dear. Then i was gone.

She said " let's sing the Cripple Song together".

Then i was gone.

by KrispyDymond December 18, 2017