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snail eater

by Kinorama February 23, 2023
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Snail

One sticky boi. Don't lick em tho... you could get meningitis. Slow creatures that will frick up ur garden. Others use the term "snail" to describe the speed of a person or an object. Some types of snails can be kept as pets. I have 5 pet snails. Jeremy, Jerry Seinfeld, Avery, Memphis, and Sheldon.
Dude 1: Yo Dawg.. *hits blunt* that car is as slow as a caterpillar
Dude 2: * hits snail * W A I T
Do NOT look down here.....

I'm warning u

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by None Of Ur Beezwax December 27, 2018
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Snail

Snail needs his or her medicine
by prosvsjoesamronstbrown July 18, 2025
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Pre-Snails

Technical resources that are incredibly slow and impossible to get a concrete answer out of, specifially pre-sale resources.
Sales: "Hey Carlos, I have a phone that I need to know is compatible with my network. Can you help me out?" Wed 12/16/2009 5:31 AM

Pre-Sales: "Sure, what do you need?" Wed 5/5/2010 4:39 PM

Sales: "Oh nevermind, I figured it our 5 Months ago. What is this Pre-Snails engineering!?"

Pre-Snails: "Sorry, I was busy"
by shaginwagin May 5, 2010
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Snail touch

Covering your penis with any possible gooey materials and then attempt someone else to give you oral sex while they try to remove the goo.
Hmm... Should I use pickle juice combined with jello?

Perhaps... She'll like the snail touch I'll give to her...
by Wrongsoap July 25, 2017
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Snail-Eyed

(Verb) When ones penis shrivels up inside ones body after witnessing a painful or traumatic event, especially penis inflicted.
(A man is running and slips, planting his face into the wall).

William: Ohhh ouch! That was brutal.
Robert: Uhhh, I totally just Snail-Eyed.
by TheShiningRod May 19, 2014
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Injured Snail

For those of us who are spectacularly slow - both physically and/or mentally (god help you if you're both!)

So not just a snail (renowned for their lack of speed) but one going slower than normal due to injury. Which is pretty slow.
Urmmm - I'm feeling a bit of an injured snail now, so bear with me...

Ok here we go.

A: "You know, they've taken gullible out of the dictionary?"

B: "Really! Woah!"

A: laughs.

B: what? (thinks desperately for a few mins) Oh I get it! I've been gullible! Ha ha!

A: "blimey you're quick aren't you?"

B: Really!

A: "No. You've got the mental pace of an injured snail!"
by Remakulingo March 10, 2009
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