Speeding ticket

When you, a retard that can’t just STAY IN THE FUCKING SPEED LIMIT, BECAUSE YOU ARE A RECKLESS AND DESTRUCTIVE DUMBASS, get pulled over for speeding. Dropping a gear and disappearing is also considered evading and eluding arrest; don’t do it. 1; now if you get caught you get punished MORE, dumbass, and 2; you’ll hit something and die for being a retard with a crotch rocket superbike wreck for a brain.

Respectable Sheriff: “Sir, did you even know how fucking fast you were go-“
Recipient of speeding ticket: *Drops a gear and tries to disappear, runs into an F-450, getting his blood and guts dragged across a road after being launched.*
Respectable Sheriff: “Holy shit… I’m just gonna call that one in……”
You can die, dumbass. Hold your horses and be reasonable. Have some fucking patience. Get there early, get there late; doesn’t matter. Just fucking get there and don’t die. It helps.

by The ceo of shit Cold War guns April 22, 2023

ticket feces

The bits that are left over after you scratch off an instant ticket.

What a bummer, this ticket was a loser, and my table is covered in ticket feces.

by FlickMontana September 29, 2014

How Angel Jose Robles, Hellstrom, Hellstromism, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, Messenger Add Oak Defeated The United States Of America With A $25 Open Container Ticket

How Angel Jose Robles, Hellstrom, Hellstromism, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, Messenger Add Oak Defeated The United States Of America With A $25 Open Container Ticket

How Angel Jose Robles, Hellstrom, Hellstromism, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, Messenger Add Oak Defeated The United States Of America With A $25 Open Container Ticket

by TheSpartanicaOfAnyHellstromu3e March 28, 2025

steamer's ticket

To have sex with someone three times your age plus two
i.e. if you are 18, partner is 56

hey matey, I earned my steamer's ticket last night. I slept with an old bird on a cruise ship after she gave me a tug on the dance floor

by anonymous September 15, 2020

dog ticket

An expression used to express disappointment or frustration. Could be used in place of words like "crap."

Dog ticket, John!
Bummer!
Shoot!

by red_ninja2 October 20, 2017

Ticket puller

When you take a poop and you have to constantly wipe. Its lime pulling a ticket for service. Every wipe has a little poo.

I’m sorry i took so long in the bathroom, every time i wiped i kept getting a new bit of poo on the toilet paper. It like a damn ticket puller at the store.

by anonymous September 2, 2025

Ticket or Flip it

Any assistance where a ticket process is involved for assistance, but individuals circumvent the setup in place cause they think they are special.

With so many people trying to avoid standard practices, I ask them up front.. Ticket or Flip it....

by js2525 August 28, 2013