The French Catheter

While getting a blow job from someone with a stoma you put your finger over the stoma to increase the suction.

Debbie wasn’t getting a good seal on Joe, so she gave herself the French catheter and finished the job like a pro.

by anonymous July 21, 2022

The French Tampon

When you soak your tampons in only the finest French champagnes. Such as a Salon Blanc de Blancs Le Mesnil-sur-Oger 2002. or a Pol Roger Sir Winston Churchill. Chilled is best, the champagne and the tampon.

"J'ai trempé mon tampon uniquement dans le meilleur champagne français" - How you tell people you are doing the French Tampon.

by Le Chatouilleur Français March 7, 2023

the French pencil

When you are going to have sex with a ugly women, but your penis can't get fully hard. You proceed to have sex with a half chub and have to live with the regret. Hopefully your friends don't find out.

I really needed some last night, but I had to give her the French pencil. She was rough...

by Doc Johnson 710 April 8, 2023

The French Wars of Religion

an inter-ethnic civil war in France that ended in 1589

if you want something more interesting than The French Wars of Religion go back to the Crusades of the middle ages and fight people of a different ethnic group.

by Uncle Dimma November 5, 2019

The French Adam Johnson

Fucking a croissant in a Sunderland shirt

Last night, I gave her The French Adam Johnson and she got me mistaken for Jordan Pickford

by dogtoes June 11, 2018

The French Exit

A sexual activity where one partner defecates on the other’s chest in the shape of either a croissant or a large baguette.

My fiancé did The French Exit on me while I was sleeping last night...

by Yeetus Deletus April 12, 2021

The French Muffin

The French Muffin is the art of defecating into your own hand, molding it into a muffin, and devouring it before it gets cold.

Also refer to French Soup.

Barry loves the French Muffin.

by Jakobeson November 23, 2006