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Neapoli-Tan

n. An embarrassing case of tan-gone-wrong, when 3 parts of your body all generate different shades of color, most notably white, pink, and brown. Often resembles vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate ice cream flavors, hence the name.

Neapoli-Tans are unintentional, though many pranksters of South Beach Florida have been known to Neapoli-Tan and streak through Miami Beach attacking innocent bystanders. For the latter cases, most Neapoli-Tans are with a Strawberry torso, Vanilla legs, and of course, Chocolate genitals.

The origin of Neapoli-Tan is widely disputed. Though many theories are still debated, some have traced it's roots as far back as the early 1700's, in modern day Kansas, where the indigenous tribes of Omaha and Ponca used the concept of Neapoli-Tan to gain the affection of the local village Princess. They would often use the phrase "Mein bukha hun duba choco" which translates to "Look at my Chocolate genitals", to seduce the native women in their arms.

In 2007, Neapoli-Tan's became subject to internet fame after videos were uploaded on JewTube (Hebrew sister company of video sharing site YouTube) depicting a new form of tan pranking known is "Tan in the Can" where uploaders would Neapoli-Tan their asses for a chance at winning $10,000, funded by viral company "The Search for the Best Damn Cans in the Land". JewTube was closed after Company founder Bernie Weisman was linked to a prostitution ring, registering under his alias "Not Jewish Guy"

See also: Neapolitics
Drewsh: Look at the kid! He's got a red stomach, white legs, and chocolate genitals. That's a Neapoli-Tan!

Guy 1: Why were you looking at his genitals?

Guy 2: Wait. Your name's Drewsh?
by Schnalex July 15, 2010
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Neapolitan

A Sexual Endeavor
Insert penis into a bloody vag, then insert penis into butt, suck off to finish.
"My girl is on the rag, so I gave her a Neapolitan "

"Woah, you got it in all three holes?"

"Fuck'n A"
by jkad March 21, 2008
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Neapolitan

Neapolitan
When you pack a bowl that contains bud, kief, and hash which resembles the icecream
That Neapolitan was so dank, it put me on that next level trippin.

Phil: hey bro you tryna pack a Neapolitan?

Stew: Hell yea. I want to get high
by Yul Perkins September 9, 2013
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Neapolitan Surprise

The act of discovering that during intercourse with a woman, your penis has been shit upon, and that said girl is also on her period; as well the discovering is marked by examination directly after your climax during vaginal sex.
Thus creating an instance of bloody shit covered cum dick, much like that of a neapolitan ice cream bar.
"Last night I had a surprise with the girl I took home..."- Unlucky Man 1

"What sort of surprise, dear friend?"- Dear Friend

"A Neapolitan Surprise"- Unlucky Man 1

*Vomits*-Dear Friend
by Not sure why I thought of this January 20, 2010
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Neapolitan Deal

A cuckoldry act in heterosexual relationships in which the female partner dominates a third party male, who is simultaneously dominating the male partner, forming a triple decker sexual act much like Neapolitan ice cream.
"My wife and I have a Neapolitan Deal with our neighbor, Todd."
by sinthia April 20, 2019
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Neapolitan Ice Cream

When you ejaculate, cough up blood and shit at the same time
Guy 1: bro I just had some Neapolitan ice cream

Guy 2: gross
by kill m3 June 26, 2019
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Neapolitanism

A sociological metaphor in which racial subdivisions of human are portrayed by three flavors of ice cream contained in the same box and maintaining the idea 'as time passes, the edges begin to melt together, eventually, and inevitably, mixing into one single colored sludge', resulting in a divine racial singularity.
It's simple Neapolitanism. I believe all variants of human shall ultimately combine to become a single species with a single understanding of our universe. We will explore space together and maybe, someday, we'll be somebody's aliens. Most of us alive now will not likely live long enough to see this but I promise you, it is inevitable and it will happen.
by Iscariom January 15, 2020
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