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Guido

gotti wannabes, that have hair as tall as their dick wear clothes tighter than there bitches' and adapt the customs of an umpa lumpa in order to succeed in having orange skin.
I went to bring my girlfriend to the tanning salon, and that guido Giovanni came out orange as fuck!
by april may june September 5, 2006
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GUIDO

A disgusting sweaty italian man who has no respect for women, dresses like a piece of shit in velour suits and gold chain with greasy hair and a bad attitude. These scums reside in south jersey , some in new york. They have a stupid cheesy accent to go along with their shitty style. Sometimes they wear 80s shirts or tank tops and a pair of baggy pants and sometims they wear armani knock off. Depends if they are at club , beach , etc. STay well away from them or at least try to cause they have no respect for women or dudes they with. They are rude , ignorant, foul mouth punks who need a good ass whippin. Greasebags.
Joey Buttafuco is a greasy guido
The dude you see at the beach with a fake gold chain on and a tank top or wife beater, hes the one makin stupid faces and tryin to act tough or macho and likes hes hot shit when hes really nothin- just a worthless greasebag guido.
by guido hater/ damn italians February 26, 2005
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Guido

Guido:
Any of the cast members on "Jersey Shore".
by blacjac November 26, 2010
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guido

A "guy" that goes to the tanning bed, wears girl earrings, lip gloss, tight tank tops or untucked dress shirts that say things about their dick. must have really annoying accent and fist pump
Chad Parmenter: I want to be a guido because i love Jersey Shore.

Everyone: Youre a fairy.
by guidoguidoguidoguido January 25, 2010
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Guido

A normally tan individual that is constantly thinking about himself and ways to make him appear cool, such as: Going to the gym, Taking a variety of vitamins and supplements, Tanning, Constantly grooming his blowout/facial hair, Partaking in an excessive amount of photos, Clubbing, Wearing very expensive/tight clothing, Bragging
Look at that fuckin guido, he has over 1,500 pictures on facebook and hes making the same face in everyone.
by bpalms May 4, 2008
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guido

1. In Turin (Piedmont, NW Italy), bus chaffeurs. In Italian "guido" is a pun because it means "I drive" and is also a proper name for men. If you call a driver this way it seems like he's familiar to you. This saying is no longer very widespread.
Il guido prende rosso anche alle rotonde. Che palle.
The chaffeur gets the red traffic light at roundabouts, too. That sucks.
by Uslengh November 9, 2014
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guido

Being one from the Tri-State area, I can confirm that a Guido is a piss poor excuse for an Italian-American selling out his culture, country, and way of life. \

Commonly seen in trendy clubs/dive bars looking like half-a-fag with slicked up hair, shirts two sizes too small, popped-collars, ripped/tight jeans, and whatever else is trendy at the time, they are often dancing in the middle of the floor like a jackass while all the regular people point and laugh.
In said habitats, they are often seen drinking bitch drinks with cute umbrellas that are various colors of the rainbow, undoubtedly symbolizing their homosexuality.
Also can be described as a douchebag, among other various insults, that has an inflated sense of self worth, compounded by the IQ of someone that is legally retarded, behaving like a complete jackass in public at all times no matter how fucking retarded he may appear.
A fake, peice of shit looking bronze tan is commonly seen on these poor excuses of a human being, which adds to their ridiculous image that makes my life a hell of a lot more bearable.
Always seen in a gym, these jacked up guys actually have the balls the size of peanuts. Unable to fight a fight on their own, the rely on the fact that they travel in packs in order to intimidate those around them. When seen on their own, flight usually takes precedence when faced with a physical altercation.
If you seen one of these creatures in the wild, take cover, take pictures, and laugh. The most pathetic thing about these kids is that they actually take themselves seriously.
ex. The Gotti Brothers, those guys you see in the funny Guido videos on youtube.com.
by JasonMB September 20, 2006
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