Goontard

GoonTard - a Portmanteau of Gooner and Retarded. Used to refer to a Chronic Compulsive Masturbator who jerks off for hours and hours and hours every day. He eventually becomes a stupid gooner and looks like he's retarded because his brain has shut down all but core functions. Most guys consider them Idiots and Morons because they have no goals or ambition other than to masturbate all day long, usually on the internet where anyone can see them.

Tim: Hey Ryan, I heard your older brother is a GoonTard

Ryan: Yeah, he's a Total GoonTard.

Tim: Does he really do nothing but masturbate all day?

Ryan: Yeah, mom and dad have given up on him. He hasn't left his sroom in 3 months, so they just slide a plate of food in there once a day.

Tim: Sorry bro.

Ryan: Yeah Me too. I'm afraid I'm gonna become a GoonTard too.

by Antonio El Pajero July 31, 2020

Goon Gang

A hacking group known for IoT malware, doxing Internet personality’s , DDoSing popular websites and businesses, And many other illegal activities that involve hacking. The groups motives are unclear now and the supposed “leader” of the group goes by the name “Joshtimeouts” or “El Diablo” (The Devil).

Goon gang on top

by Anonymous Researcher October 13, 2020

goon shit

The act of doing things against the law that are funny

Did you see all the goon shit Scott is doing?

by Joker Stroker September 24, 2016

Goon Girl

The female version of the male "Goon", in the sexual subculture of chronic and compulsive masturbators. A pornsexual woman who is a bit of a shut-in, and enjoys having sex with other male goons for their edging potential. Typically pornographic content is displayed while the goon girl has sex with her partner. She rides him for as long as possible, perhaps many minutes or even hours at a time while watching porn on her respected device. She may also gratify the goon while watching her favorite porn scene. In the absence of pornographic symbiosis with a male goon, she reads a lot of erotic novels, watches porn by herself, and possibly cams to allow other gooners to worship her. She is hedonistic and disregards competition anxiety for sexual opportunities with like-minded men. She surprises male gooners by joining their video sessions and chat rooms to masturbate with them.

Goon 1: "Bro, I heard your numbers got higher?"

Goon 2: " Yeah, it's because a goon girl found me and I've been able to last longer"
Goon 1: " I thought that girl was an incel"
Goon 2: " Nah, ... she's here for you too."
Goon 1: " We should ask her if she will goon with us tonight"
Goon 2: "I'm sure, she'll be down"

by Anon_!123 December 30, 2018

Goon Mantle

Ceremonial garment instantly transferred from the biggest loser in your school to the second biggest when, for example, the former is unexpectedly selected to play for the school football team, star in the school play, bones a prom queen, etc. Sometimes shortened to 'Mantle'.

Example 1

Guy 1: Check out that guy in the glasses. Dude look low, man. Dude look like he bearin the whole world on his shoulders.
Guy 2: Worse than that, man. He bearin the Goon Mantle.

Example 2

Dad: They beat up on you in class again, kid?
Kid: Nah, the cheerleader captain blew me after math. Bernard got the Mantle now.

by PearlFly January 24, 2013

Goon scoop

The sexual act In where a goon nigga uses a bucket of ice cream and spoon, to scoop ice cream into a girls ass.

Yo, have you goon scooped your girl??
Yeah it was extra chocolate last night.

by Voizdev August 26, 2021

Adam Gontier

Adam Gontier is the lead singer, rhythm guitarist and songwriter for the Canadian rock band Saint Asonia buthe is best-known as the former lead singer, rhythm guitarist and songwriter of the Canadian rock band Three Days Grace. He has also released some songs as a solo artist and collaborated with other artists such as, but not limited to Apocalyptica, Art of Dying, and The Big Dirty Band.

Fan: Hey, do you like Adam Gontier?
Idk: Who’s Adam Gontier?
Fan: That’s it! We’re done talking. Get the fuck out of my sight! (Jk I’ll still talk to you even if you don’t know him because you do now after reading this)

by The only name not in use July 28, 2018