guardaroo

It's a kangaroo trained to guard your house. What the fuck else did you think it was?

The guardaroo pounced up and, gripping the burglar's genitals, removed them with a quick twist.

by Flix December 8, 2009

guardian asshole

An adversary so feeble, hapless, and inept that his treacherous or duplicitous actions actually end up insulating his intended target from any and all harm originally intended to be inflicted upon him.

"My fat bastard of a supervisor and her idiot flunkies made my life so miserable that I resigned my post and took a position elsewhere. Thirteen weeks later, my former place of work became embroiled in an international scandal that resulted in criminal charges being filed against the corrupt, messianic boss; innocent employees being deported; and the filing of a multi-million dollar lawsuit that threatens the financial solvency of the institution."

"Wow. Staying with that sinking ship could have ended your whole career. The douchebags who badgered you into resigning actually ended up being your guardian assholes."

by Can'tstopthesignal July 7, 2014

Guardian Stalker

A little thing with lots of legs that shoots deadly lasers at things, appears in Legend of Zelda, Breath of the Wild. You can also control them.

Link: Oh no! A guardian! Run!
Guardian Stalker: Haha die
Link: *jumps on and drives on top of a volcano*

by adhesivestiky October 23, 2018

sexurity guard

A stripper that is dressed up like a security guard at the club.

At the strip club
"Man look at the sexurity guard"

by thecimacialpersonthatcantbelie November 28, 2012

Cat Guardian

One who lives to guard the existence of felines with his life. A person who is very good with computers, and is usually a 4.0 student. His parents shall be divorced, and make all of his gamer tags relevant to cats. His background on his computer should be a big cat. He spends 99% of his time reading about pussy (cats) and is also known by the name of Anthony.

Damn cat guardian really knows a lot about dat pussy

by Toms disappointed father December 18, 2012

Coast Guard Reserve

When a "straight" female, whilst on a business trip, decides to play for the other team for the duration of the trip only.

Diane it appears has gone full "coast guard reserve" with the ladies from the trade show.

by handfullofass December 15, 2014

Color Guard

People call us 'Marching band Cheerleaders'. Then we use our oversized pole weapons to beat them to death and after you finish in a Flourish into a Giant.

Person 1- It's the Marching Band Cheerleaders

Person 2- Oh yea
Me- *hitting person with flag rhythmically to satisfaction* I'm in Color Guard

by Precious Warrior March 12, 2018