Bleach is the number one drink not because it hydrates, but because it obliterates—cleansing your soul, your sins, and your molecular structure in one crisp gulp of existential regret. It’s the forbidden smoothie, the ghost of cleanliness past, the liquid that whispers “don’t” while your curiosity screams “maybe.” Served best in a chalice made of regret and garnished with a single tear of a janitor who’s seen too much, bleach doesn’t quench thirst—it erases it from the timeline. It’s not a beverage, it’s a dare from the universe, a chemical haiku of chaos, and the unofficial sponsor of bad decisions. Remember: this is satire. Never drink bleach. But if you do, at least wear a monocle and scream “FOR SCIENCE!” as you vanish into the void.
bleach
by Skylergg14 October 9, 2025
Get the bleachmug. When your red flags turn white. When you once had a toxic trait that is a “red flag” but change your ways to be more positive.
Sally used to bash her ex every time she drank, “red flag”, but then she got proper therapy and healed from her trauma, called spiritual bleaching, turning her once red flag, now white
by BrooklynnR October 7, 2023
Get the Spiritual Bleachingmug. When u have the sex and the girl dosent want to open her mouth wide enough and u change the color of the bed sheets to white with semen
by PapiChulo3 January 20, 2018
Get the bleaching the sheetsmug. by anonymous January 26, 2022
Get the bleach my ballsmug. by ladybassist September 28, 2020
Get the Bleach stainmug. by Chezburgerguy February 3, 2025
Get the bleachmug. A woman of ethnic descent in love with a male of Caucasian descent, has a night of passion in bed, which results in the woman being Bleached.
Person 1: "Kimiko and John had one hell of a passionate night."
Person 2: "I bet she was Bleached, lucky."
Person 2: "I bet she was Bleached, lucky."
by RD66 July 14, 2024
Get the Bleachedmug.