Stalagmite

The act of being not funny

"After Pat made a dumb joke, we all told him that he was stalagmite"

by Michael Albert November 10, 2004

sodalactite

Drops of soda which have stuck to the inside of your big-gulp.

The (coca-)cola sodalactite is much more visible than the 7-up sodalactite.

by Geoffrey Cusic May 11, 2004

Stalacshites

The poop formations that occur on the bottom of a toilet seat due to explosive shitting.

I hate cleaning the bathroom after Taco Tina! She always leaves stalacshites, that nasty bitch.

by Nomitus May 27, 2015

Subway Stalagmite

n. Contrary to subway stalactite, subway stalagmite does not form on the ceiling. Subway stalagmite is a deposit left by dripping sewer water or run-off that comes from the stalactite deposits on subway ceilings. Usually it is a lighter color, though it ranges from white to brown, and gives off a foul odor. This can be attributed to the fact that it’s on the floor, below your nose, where air can circulate up to your nose. These are generally flat, and do not develop as tall or as quickly as subway stalactite.

A white to brown flat deposit below a dripping sewer pipe that gives off a foul odor can be considered subway stalagmite.

by Srztanjur October 5, 2009

stalagmite

when you take a dump and let it harden then stab someone with it

you be mean, I stalagmite you

by mr. 2cool November 4, 2011

stalagmite

A protrusion that can be used in a number of ways. It is stiff, unchanging, and can endure excessive amounts of pressure. It can vary in length and girth, and it usually is very straight and points in an upwardly direction.

"She rode my stalagmite all night long. I didn't even have to move."

by Calihoya December 2, 2004

stalagtite

Someone so cute you would hang around them even if nothing is going on - sediment slowly dripping down your body as you grow.

Annie is my stalagtite

by justusingthisonce August 25, 2016