Futon

Jack plows on his futon whilst Poppin

On the futon imma give her that penis

by DarkDestroyer442 April 22, 2021

Sheets on the futon

A person, usually young male, trying to clean up the house on the chance they are going to get lucky

Not sure if she is worth it, but James "put the sheets on the futon" before his date with Anita.

by LlSS April 21, 2008

futoned

To be head shot in team fortress 2.

or 1 shot in most other video games.

that dude just futoned my whole team!

by Chaoticminded August 25, 2010

futon john

A douche that likes to remind every person he meets that he was conceived on a futon.

Kid 1: "Have you met Futon John?"

Kid 2: "No, but I heard he was a douche."

Kid 3: "I heard he was conceived on a futon."

Kid 1: "I wish I was conceived on a futon."

by Dubya14 November 25, 2013

futon dick

Futon dick

A guy who provides exceptional dick from his futon but doesn't have his shit together has futon dick.

by Siouxsie Supertramp June 14, 2023

Faponit

Faponit™ is *the* miracle cure: If you have a serious relationship-related decision to make, use some Faponit™ before, and it becomes so much easier!

@see fap on it

- "Geez, should I get back to my ex?"
- "I'd recommend using some Faponit™ first."

by wwwrun August 22, 2011

futon

another word for an asian.

"Hey, those damn futons forgot to give me duck sauce.. again!"

"That bitch had a cute face for being such a flat assed futon"

by niggins August 13, 2007