worker's compensation

Homer: Hey, where's Charlie? How'd he get out of this?
Carl: Uh, he's at home on worker's compensation.
Lenny: Yeah, he got injured on the job and they sent him home with pay. It's like a lottery that awards stupidity.
Homer: Stupidity, eh?
by KingSizedHomer July 10, 2010
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compensated endorser

A new euphemism for "paid actor". Commonly found on late night infomercials and programming on television stations with a high amount of senior citizens as its viewer base.
"Don't take our word for it, though! Ask compensated endorser Tom Kruze for his opinion!" "I was worried that trying Extenze was not only unhealthy, but completely pointless and fiscally irresponsible, but now, my schlort is still worth precisely nothing!"
by Aeiouza December 26, 2013
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Twerkers' compensation

The demand for pain relief for the mind, body, and soul the day after an evening of combining dance (twerk) and alcohol consumption to a point of excess.
"Man, I raged so hard at that Good Charlotte show, I definitely need Twerkers' compensation today."
by The Stafford Executive September 08, 2013
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penile compensation

New 4dr 4WD trucks with every option known to exist attached. This helps compensate for a small dick. These vehicles seldom leave pavement as 99% of the people who own them don't want to get mud on their Izod & Dockers, or could very well get stuck due to lack of knowledge in off-roading. Hummers also fit in this category.
He's driving that truck as a form of penile compensation
by Imperial1931 November 05, 2005
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Compensation Brush

an extensive, thorough teeth brushing right before one's dentist appointment; as to make up for the lack of quality brushes prevalent in the past
Due to heavy partying and shear laziness, Joe had to mix in a serious compensation brush to pass off some half-decent dental hygiene before his 12 o'clock appointment.
by Rone Diddy March 15, 2011
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Financial Compensation

A euphemism for Mesothelioma.

Named after the variety of commercials by ambulance-chasing lawyers that are seen on television.
My dad was a construction worker, and he got 'Financial Compensation' after being exposed to asbestos.
by Chianticat10 February 22, 2023
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Compensation Cannon

An absurdly large handgun or anything else even vaguely phallic in shape.

Example: Colt .50 "Grizzly" revolver featuring ~1.5 in long cartridge that almost can't be fired for fear of breaking ones nose.

OR

A $300 Canon™ camera with a variety of speialty lenses so that Unlce Eggbert can catch that action shot of baby Rufus' runny nose at the family reunion softball game.
Guy 1: Hey! Check out this Craftsman jackhammer! You know what this baby can do?

Neighbor: Relieve your insecurity?
by Oooga-Booga May 19, 2005
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