Wanker's Cramp 

Noun

A painful stiffening of the muscles of the hand, characteristically caused by excessive amounts of masturbation.

Wanker's Cramp is likely the most pathetic accidental self-inflicted injury of all time, being just slightly above paper cuts from toilet paper, balsa wood splinters, and pressing the button on Bop It too vigorously.

Jim hasn't left the house for almost 5 days. It's only a manner of time before he gets Wanker's Cramp.

Wanker's Cramp by IQuarent July 22, 2014

wankers burn 

wankers burn is not unlike a chinese burn, it happens when your straight up and down action developes a slight sidewards twist , thus causing surface errosion of the penis , can be treated by using a splint made out of ice lolly sticks and cotton wool dipped in linseed oil and tar , leave on for a couple of weeks and bobs your uncle good as new and ready for the next round, wankers burn support groups are available ,

doc wats the cure for wankers burn , a fat chick with the pox

wankers burn by jizzcannon1 February 21, 2011

wankerfag 

A wankerfag is a prissy, screechy, whiny little Beta male who thinks he knows everything and is obnoxious to the nth degree. He gets on everyone's tits with his know-it-all attitude. This person is despised by all who know him and he knows it. BBC ornithologist Bill Oddie would be a prime example of a wankerfag.

"Did you see the TV programme last night about the starlings?"
"No I didn't. Who was the host?"
"Hmmmm, Bill Oddie I think."
"Oh no! Glad I didn't watch it now. I can't abide that tossy little wankerfag."

wankerfag by Barry Spanners June 20, 2016

wankerschmankle 

a man so dedicated to masturbation that it affects his daily life and physiology; a wank addict.
a wankerschmankle will often never leave his house and if you ever spot one, his dick is probably out 24/7 and hes masturbating constantly

bobert: yo i never met my neighbor face to face but the locals tell me hes a wankerschmankle

wankerschmankle by Pan-racial monkey March 6, 2017

Wankersaurus

Someone who has an unrestible urge to masturbate and achieve a full orgasm but is unable to due to circumstances

Stephanie is a wankersaurus because her fingers are too fat to finger herself.

John is a wankersaurus because his arms aren't long enough too reach his genitals.

Wankersaurus by Saggie nips December 19, 2017

Wanker Anchor 

According do Daniel Sloss : a person who stays the same with you when you suffer loss. They don't walk on eggshells around you; they remain constant.

"You're such a wanker anchor"

Wanker Anchor by inthemoodforsomehellraising December 21, 2018

Oban Wanker 

Oban wankers are people who have difficulty spelling, piss you off easily and hang about in large groups. Even when they try to be nice they still fail as they go about it in a ridiculous way. They may wear chinos on occasion even though they claim chinos are wankers. Some even reach the extent of not knowing how to spoon. You do not have to be from Oban to be an Oban Wanker.

"I dought it, im wearing my chinos"
"your such an Oban Wanker"

Oban Wanker by alemk October 29, 2011