black jesus painting 

A really shitty painting of a black Jesus found mostly in poor black people's homes. Usually painted by someone with questionable artistic talent.

You know that cat Dirty Red who I buy that kush from? He has a Black Jesus painting promintely displayed in his filthy living room, that shit creeps me out yo.

black jesus painting by suicide assistant March 8, 2007

brown Jesus 

A dump so large it is as if the ass of God came forth and gave you His only Son, in turd form.

"I should warn you, I'm going to have to enlist the services of a plumber because my brown Jesus' broke the toilet."

brown Jesus by brownjesusjesus June 7, 2007

come to jesus/come to jesus talk 

you better ask jesus to save you right now before you are killed, usually by one of your parents

father:(to a boy messing around with his daughter)
what were you doing to my baby girl? you better get your life straight boy because we're gonna have a come to jesus talk.

come to jesus/come to jesus talk by ruffpuff July 28, 2004

Korean Jesus 

Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky's illegitimate son with down syndrome, routinely chained and abused by North Koreans as part of the anti-west propaganda and for personal pleasure. It is customary to gag Korean Jesus with one's own turd after a forced fuck. Notable (ab)users include Jonah Hill and Kim Jong Il.

Stop fucking with Korean Jesus! He ain't got time for your problems, he's busy with Korean shit.

Korean Jesus by Django's black ass March 6, 2014

athiest jesus 

Jesus who doesn't believe in himself

Hey look it's athiest jesus.

athiest jesus by Darkonesdeath June 22, 2016

What the Jesus Christ man?! 

Similar to "What the Jesus?" but used in times of immense anger where no other words can come to mind.

Example 1:

After being cut off at highspeed on the freeway:

"What the Jesus Christ man?!"

Example 2:

After one walks in to find a significant other cheating:

"Honey this is not what it looks like"

Reaching for gun:

"What the Jesus Christ man?!"

What the Jesus Christ man?! by Rustee John April 19, 2008

Mission For Jesus 

Eagerly completing a journey that seems so very important to the person that is on the journey, but meaningless to everyone else. Much like a real Mission for Jesus or MHF for short

Someone passes you and then changes lanes to pass the person in front of you. You remark to your passenger "Wow! That guy is on a Mission for Jesus!"

Mission For Jesus by me too 2 June 17, 2009