jared diamond

The eternal God of guns, germs, and steel.

I wish I was Jared Diamond
Why
Because he knows all and is the ultimate God

by Jared Diamond GGS June 12, 2016

jared leto

A hot guy who knows how to act and is very hot. Did i mention very hot?

Have you ever seen Jared Leto in Requiem for a Dream? He's a hottie!

by Jamie April 10, 2004

Jared Dudley

Imagine a below average player, with a diseased potato head playing basketball.

I forgot to water my crops all year, now they look like Jared Dudley’s.

by NBAdefinitions April 19, 2019

jared koch

one who is obssessed with anal sex.

See you in fifteen minutes Jared Koch, I'm off to the toilet to release a few 'Chocolate hostages' from the Rusty Sheriff's Badge.

by misshaha November 6, 2011

Jare Bear

a polar bear native to E-Town New York that has a lot of money, shits gold bricks, has big muscles and has been tamed by the wicked ice bitch of the north.

Jared is a gay rights activist Jare Bear

by TMiiiiiiiiitch June 21, 2011

Jared Borgetti

One of the greatest Mexican Strikers ever. 2nd most prolific striker in the world by 2005. and is the number one scorer in Mexican history. he played in the Mexican Futbol (soccer) leauge for awhile. until becoming the first ever Mexican born player to play in Englands FA Premiership. signing with Bolton. he is currently playing for the Saudi Arabian club Al-Ittad

Jared Borgetti scores another goal for Mexico!

by 9JBorgetti August 19, 2006

Jared Leto'd

A sexual position of controlled thrusting, such as while pressed against a wall, whereupon the man is able to paint the fingernails of his partner for mutual sexual pleasure and a great manicure.

I was cruising round Little Venice, when an ombre-hued hunk with piercing blue eyes and lashings of black eyeliner approached me. I immediately took him back to my boiler cupboard and disrobed. He spun me around and pinned me to the wall; I spread my legs, he plunged inside me. He stood still, and produced a riding crop. With one sharp smack to my buttock, he yelled "Yeehaa", and I was on my way. As I was thrusting against his rigid rod, I saw him reach for my 219 Black Satin Chanel nail polish. He uncapped it slowly, and teased open the lid. Beginning with my left hand, he proceeded to stroke the brush against my bare nail, several times. To my immediate arousal, I saw he too was wearing 219 Black Satin Chanel nail polish.

After he had finished the first hand, I felt a sharp smack on my other buttock, whereupon he exalted another "Yeehaa", while proceeding with a whip and dip. He then started on my right hand, my fingers trembling as I continued to thrust; yet I contained my excitement. As he delicately coloured my nails one by one, I thrust harder, and faster. Finally, he reached my pinkie finger, and with the final stroke we both let out a loud "Yeehaa" and collapsed in a heap, satiated and manicured.

- Oh my god, you wont believe what I got up to last night, I met this super hot guy and he Jared Leto'd me.

by Little Venice January 28, 2014