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Dwayne "The Cock" Johnson 

A person with an incredibly super duper long cock.
wtf he is a Dwayne "The Cock" Johnson
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Dwayne the rock Johnson’s boner during sex 

About 8-11 feet long, and it takes about 2 mins for him to cum, and he cums with about 1/2 quart and 38 miles per hour
I watched a video of Dwayne the rock Johnson’s boner during sex

you make the baby Jesus cry 

something some one says when they are shocked at what you just said
Dead Baby jokes.
Racial Jokes.
MILF Jokes.
Jesus Jokes.
(Man 1)how do you stop a baby from cawling around in circles.
(Man 2) How.
(Man 1) You Nail the other hand down.
(Man 2) That is so fucked up, you make the baby Jesus Cry.

The Quirky Jewish Boy

When you go skydiving, and you pull down your pant and take a HUGE dump. It accelerates so fast to the ground it becomes a deadly weapon.
The guy has to shit, so he did the Quirky Jewish Boy.

Between the leg jpeg

A picture taken with the camera thrust between someon's legs.
See that picture? It is actually a between the leg jpeg.

the Steve Jeltz of 

Steve Jeltz was a professional baseball player in the 1980s; he is generally regarded as one of the worst baseball players in recent memory. This belief may not be truly justified, but I digress...

To say somebody is "the Steve Jeltz of (something)" is to say that that person is among the worst in his or her profession, while indicating to the listener that you have some knowledge of baseball history.
About three years ago, I was watching some shitty horror movie with a friend and fellow baseball fan. I became irritated with the remarkably stiff and unconvincing performance of one of the actors, which led me to remark that he was "the Steve Jeltz of actors." Immediately after I said this, that actor yelled "OHHHH NOOOO!" in a hilariously bad voice.

My friend began laughing uncontrollably because of the unintentional, but perfect, juxtaposition of these two events. Since then, we have often referred to people who really suck at certain things as being "the Steve Jeltz of (whatever)."
the Steve Jeltz of by C-Mills September 14, 2012