by Dr moose knuckle May 8, 2018
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The level in which your intuition kicks in and tells your gut you are dealing with a level of. Douchness, far beyond any basic level of comprehension.
Usually your doucheometer kicks in when you recognize the effects experienced by the typical recognizable attributes, such as: "What are you talking about? It was you, not me" when discussing the fact that you know damn well the nutella jar is empty and you didn't have any...
Claims the order was for him and then runs off with your pizza that you already paid for...
Sees you coming with an assload of shopping bags and then proceeds to lock and deadbolt the door, while staring through the glass at you with a mildly disdainful smirk...
And after all of this, proceeds to tell you, YOURE THE TROLL!!!!!!
Claims the order was for him and then runs off with your pizza that you already paid for...
Sees you coming with an assload of shopping bags and then proceeds to lock and deadbolt the door, while staring through the glass at you with a mildly disdainful smirk...
And after all of this, proceeds to tell you, YOURE THE TROLL!!!!!!
by IHateyoutoo,Austin!!! January 30, 2019
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A female who continuously rejects a great man for a number one douche. No matter what, the good man does for her, the douche keeps collecting money. She will complain about relationships, money, men, purses, jewelry, etc. The Doucheomitis will also complain about the douche bad and hold on to the real man. It's a disease and women are suffering daily. Professional help is required but not often seeked. Doucheomitis is a common undiagnosed disorder. She will see out a Douche no matter what gem is thrown in her path. Poor, poor, poor darling has potential. I am sorry but your friend are tired of telling you if he is right..
A female who continuously rejects a great man for a number one douche. No matter what, the good man does for her, the douche keeps collecting money. She will complain about relationships, money, men, purses, jewelry, etc. The Doucheomitis will also complain about the douche bad and hold on to the real man. It's a disease and women are suffering daily. Professional help is required but not often seeked. Doucheomitis is a common undiagnosed disorder. She will see out a Douche no matter what gem is thrown in her path. Poor, poor, poor darling has potential. I am sorry but your friend are tired of telling you if he is right..
Omg! Doucheomitis picke me up in his Bentley, I fucked him, and now he won't answer! What do I do? Pat is pissed and won't talk to me!
by Noodle paradise July 10, 2021
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When you are so unbelievably hungover that standing vertically is barely possible, so you recline in the tub, turn on the shower, and let the hot water splash over you as you recall snippets of your outrageous, pompous behavior from the night before. For a traditional Douchenkrumple allow the water wash away your regret for at least 30 minutes or until the water goes cold.
When you are so unbelievably hungover that standing vertically is barely possible, so you recline in the tub, turn on the shower, and let the hot water splash over you as you recall snippets of your outrageous, pompous behavior from the night before. For a traditional Douchenkrumple allow the water wash away your regret for at least 30 minutes or until the water goes cold.
Georgann: "Are you coming to brunch? The bowling league you were taking Irish Car Bombs with might join"
Anders: "to be honest I might be taking my second douchenkrumple soon..."
Georgeann: "oh $%#..."
Anders: "to be honest I might be taking my second douchenkrumple soon..."
Georgeann: "oh $%#..."
by Douchenkrumple January 10, 2022
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