Belt On The Shelf

A Weapon Used In Psychological Warfare In The Early 80's & 90's.

The Urban Version On Elf On The Shelf, Used To Persuade Kids Into Good Behavior.
The Mere Sight Of It Drove Fear Into The Hearts Of Every Boy & Girl.

Made Mostly Of Top Grade Leather, Although Synthetic Fabrics

Or Vinyl Was Always An Exceptable Substitute. The Silent Babysitter.

Originated In New Bedford Massachusetts By Cape Verdean People !

" Stop it, Momma Is Not Playing With Us You Big Dummy, Don't You See That BELT ON THE SHELF ? "

by Outlaw City Graffix © March 21, 2016

Jam the Shelf Angel

Jam the Shelf Angel is a departed soul of good. Jam is the counterpart and opposite of Jim the Closet Demon. Jam’s gender identity is described only as ‘binary’ and they use she/they pronouns. They are 7 inches tall (17.48 cm) and have a wide frame with thick thighs. This is also the opposite of Jim the Closet Demon who is described as tall and lanky. Jam the Shelf Angel primarily exists within shelves and does not want or require sacrifices or worship.

Person 1: “Is that Jim the Closet Demon?”

Person 2: “No, that is Jam the Closet Angel and you are showing your ignorance because Jim and Jam are nothing alike.”

Person 1: “Oh, should I worship Jam the Shelf Angel?”
Person 2: “No you absolute fool.”

by Turtle in a box September 2, 2022

i hate it when i accidentally build a shelf

Google humo(u)r

Same for help i accidentally summoned a lemon

urban dictionary wants me to include the word so i hate it when i accidentally build a shelf

by SkyBeetle July 12, 2022

Elf on the Shelf

An extraordinarily stupid holiday tradition practiced by white, suburb-dwelling families which involves "hiding" a creepy doll somewhere in the house, for their young children to find. This may seem innocent enough, but the real motive behind this fad is to attempt to control the offspring's behavior through the threat of the Elf telling Santa Claus of the misdeeds they committed under the omnipotent surveillance of the Elf. A adult satire of this is Whore in the Drawer, simply replacing the Elf with a scantily clothed Barbie doll, and the shelf with a cabinet or drawer.

Wife: Jim, did you hide the Elf on the Shelf
Husband: No Carol, for fuck's sake, I told you it gives me the willies.

by bonquequeg March 17, 2016

shoeface

a dog which constantly picks up human shoes to express its devotion to its owner

Sparky - Stop being such a shoeface and give me back my loafer.

by dogman22 February 27, 2009

Sholing

A very nice little part of Southampton with a village green, a Tescos and a few other shops. It spreads out quite a bit so it's not always clear where Sholing starts and ends. Sholing is near to Weston, Woolston, Thornhill, Bitterne and Bursledon.

I live in Sholing.
Which part of Sholing?
Near to Tescos.

by sparklyamanda December 30, 2010

Shelf Warmer

The unwanted toys at a retail outlet.

Man I wanted a Marvel Universe Blade figure but all they had were shelf warmer Spidermans.

by DanceLoganDance December 17, 2011