The act of a woman or person with a clitoris masturbating while laying face down.
Named after Netflix's Sex Education character Aimee, who is shown doing this in Season 1. Afterwards, she tells friends: “I’ve been wanking all night; I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off."
Crumpeting is the preferred masturbation position of many people because it puts pleasurable weight and pressure on the genitals. There is also a feminist element to the celebration of crumpeting, in that a lot of porn designed to cater to the male gaze shows women wanking on their backs, legs splayed wide so that men can see everything; in reality, plenty of women prefer touching themselves in ways that are less about performing for others and more about genuinely pleasuring themselves.
Named after Netflix's Sex Education character Aimee, who is shown doing this in Season 1. Afterwards, she tells friends: “I’ve been wanking all night; I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off."
Crumpeting is the preferred masturbation position of many people because it puts pleasurable weight and pressure on the genitals. There is also a feminist element to the celebration of crumpeting, in that a lot of porn designed to cater to the male gaze shows women wanking on their backs, legs splayed wide so that men can see everything; in reality, plenty of women prefer touching themselves in ways that are less about performing for others and more about genuinely pleasuring themselves.
"Crumpeting is my favourite way to reach orgasm. I like to lay on top of my vibrator with the duvet pulled over me, all cosy."
by CanCanOfWorms September 26, 2023
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Crumlet
• crumpet
• Crumpeting
• Crumpetmuncher
• cumlet
• Chumlet
• Crumpets and Tea
• crumplet
• crudlets
• crumbleton
by Lord Pervert of Shittingswell November 18, 2023
Get the Crumpeting mug.Food that you started to eat the night before in bed and did not finish. The food is then placed on the floor by the bed.
In the morning when getting out of bed you put your feet on the floor and inevitably tread in the food.
Chumlet is the word that encompasses every possible food known to man, therefore eliminating any embarrassment as it removes the need to specifically divulge exactly what was being eaten in bed.
This is something most of us have done or will do at some point in our lives, the term also avoids such acts as food shaming and ridicule.
In the morning when getting out of bed you put your feet on the floor and inevitably tread in the food.
Chumlet is the word that encompasses every possible food known to man, therefore eliminating any embarrassment as it removes the need to specifically divulge exactly what was being eaten in bed.
This is something most of us have done or will do at some point in our lives, the term also avoids such acts as food shaming and ridicule.
Alex : "Guess what i trod in this morning when i stepped out of bed - yep, Chumlet!"
Jackie to her boyfriend Allen :"You best remember you put that on ther floor or else in the morning it will be Chumlet"
Allen to his girlfriend Jackie : "Oh no! I've just trodden in Chumlet!"
Jackie to her boyfriend Allen :"You best remember you put that on ther floor or else in the morning it will be Chumlet"
Allen to his girlfriend Jackie : "Oh no! I've just trodden in Chumlet!"
by Alexjacallen69 February 23, 2024
Get the Chumlet mug.Chumlet
Food that you started to eat the night before in bed and did not finish. The food is then placed on the floor by the bed.
In the morning when getting out of bed you put your feet on the floor and inevitably tread in the food.
Chumlet is the word that encompasses every possible food known to man, therefore eliminating any embarrassment as it removes the need to specifically divulge exactly what was being eaten in bed.
This is something most of us have done or will do at some point in our lives, the term also avoids such acts as food shaming and ridicule.
Backstory:
The word Chumlet is a derivative of Crumpet, which is a main food of choice to eaten in bed by the British. However it is a collaboration with our fellow Americans.
The British person in question trod upon the Crumpet he had left on the floor the previous night and had the thoughts that “he must remember that it is there or else will probably tread in it.” He shared the tale of woe with me but omitted the food he had trodden in and made me guess. I could not.
Later, emailing my American boyfriend I thought I'd play a quick and not quite correct game of hangman with him. The clue was - "what did my friend tread in this morning? I gave him the letters C_ _M_ _T
His guess was CHUMLET.
We laughed at him for making up English words, but then decided in fact we do need a term for something that we almost all have done at some point in our lives, avoiding food shaming and ridicule.
Food that you started to eat the night before in bed and did not finish. The food is then placed on the floor by the bed.
In the morning when getting out of bed you put your feet on the floor and inevitably tread in the food.
Chumlet is the word that encompasses every possible food known to man, therefore eliminating any embarrassment as it removes the need to specifically divulge exactly what was being eaten in bed.
This is something most of us have done or will do at some point in our lives, the term also avoids such acts as food shaming and ridicule.
Backstory:
The word Chumlet is a derivative of Crumpet, which is a main food of choice to eaten in bed by the British. However it is a collaboration with our fellow Americans.
The British person in question trod upon the Crumpet he had left on the floor the previous night and had the thoughts that “he must remember that it is there or else will probably tread in it.” He shared the tale of woe with me but omitted the food he had trodden in and made me guess. I could not.
Later, emailing my American boyfriend I thought I'd play a quick and not quite correct game of hangman with him. The clue was - "what did my friend tread in this morning? I gave him the letters C_ _M_ _T
His guess was CHUMLET.
We laughed at him for making up English words, but then decided in fact we do need a term for something that we almost all have done at some point in our lives, avoiding food shaming and ridicule.
Alex : "Guess what i trod in this morning when i stepped out of bed - yep, Chumlet!"
Jackie to her boyfriend Allen :"You best remeber you put that on the floor or else in the morning it will be Chumlet"
Allen to his girlfriend Jackie : "Oh no! i've just trodden in Chumlet!"
Jackie to her boyfriend Allen :"You best remeber you put that on the floor or else in the morning it will be Chumlet"
Allen to his girlfriend Jackie : "Oh no! i've just trodden in Chumlet!"
by Alexjacallen69 February 24, 2024
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