molestache

a mustache that resembles that which a child molester, such as David Westerfield, might have.

Did you see that guy's molestache Yeah he looks like such a creeper.

by LexiB February 10, 2009

molestache

1. The kind of mustache or gotee that guys who refuse to a woman alone at a club or bar have; think that one guy from the backstreet boys, or european "musician" Gunter (similar to a mexistache)

2. the kind of mustache sex-offenders grow in order to seem more normal; think ned flanders or geraldo. in this instance, the upper lip is usually not visable and the stache is usually, but not always, acompanied by a mullet or mull-ette

That dick with the molestache won't stop trying to get me to go home with him. He's gross and smells like mustard.

by sam caplan April 10, 2006

molestache

type of mustache: not quite a pornstache but just as creepy.

looks like: John Mayer trying to grow a Tom Selleck mustache. John Mayer has a molestache.

by skweakrz March 8, 2011

molestache

1. a mustache thinner than one left by milk or kool aid reticent of creepers. 2. often found on the upper lips of hipsters who are on a quest for the truly ironic handlebar mustache but for some reason or another fail at attaining glory. they often make up for this lack of facial handlebars by riding around town on a neon fixed gear bike (with sweet handlebars) 3. sometimes found on men sporting mock turtlenecks. 4. found when boys skinny jeans are too tight and their leg hair sprouts on their upper lip instead.

"hey i heard you were trying to get a job at that local record bike store vegan organic cafe?"
"yeah, i don't think i fit in though...I don't have a molestache."
"but you're a girl..."

by oopseiffelover March 7, 2010

molestache

A mustache that makes you look like you molest children.

Check out that guys molestache! Keep him within 100 feet of that elementary school.

by lolamite February 3, 2010

molestache

When a person, more humorous when they happen to be female, has a mole above her upper lip area, supplemented with a mousatche, varying in thickness.

Dude, look at that chick's molestache.

by Nick (2) Chris Sean etc etc March 20, 2004

molestache

A cheesy mustache that gives the wearer the appearance of a stereotypical 1970s child molester.

John's new molestache makes me want to hide my kid whenever I see him

by delapine April 30, 2010