muffin

1. a soft, moist, delicious, breakfast (or snack); the best food in the world, not to be confused with "english muffin"

2. Heavenly food

1. "Hey, Tony! Get me a blueberry muffin!"
2. "I will get a muffin one day."

by Urban Dictionary February 9, 2005

Muffin

A muffin is a human female who engages in inauthentic friendly interactions with other parties despite having largely neutral or out right ill-will towards said parties. A muffin commonly expresses to these parties that she is a true "BFF" or that she would later like to "hang out". No further evidence of "BFF" status is ever provided. Appointments to "hang out" are either solidified and later dropped by the muffin, or more routinely never given a concrete date and time. Other common attributes of muffins inclue: Saccharine insincerity, talking badly of others behind their backs despite being kind to them in person, and Facebook pictures which involve the thrusting forward of one's bosom in an awkward attempt to posture attractively.

(Actual Interaction between a PERSON and a MUFFIN as recorded at a college town social event 9/25/2010)
MUFFIN: Oh, hi there. I haven't seen you in like forever.
PERSON: Oh, hi. How are you doing?
MUFFIN: I am doing so great. Isn't this the coolest place in the world? This is my favorite place to go ever.
PERSON: Yeah, it's alright I guess. How have you be-
MUFFIN: Remember when we took that absolutely awful class with that professor who smelled like old Rice Krispies. That class was so stupid.
PERSON: Uh, yeah, I guess.
MUFFIN: You know what? We should hang out. Seriously, you were like my best friend in that class. We were practically like sisters. We gotta do something.
PERSON: Oh, sure. You doing anything next weekend? We could grab some lunch.
MUFFIN: Oh no. I'm super busy that day, but you are on my Facebook, right?
PERSON: Um...
MUFFIN: *using cellphone* I just sent you a request. That'll be 1263 for me. *giggle* Oh hi, Jessica, I haven't seen you in forever. You know you are my best- *walks away*
PERSON: *shrug* Bye?

by Cabbage Flavored Popcorn January 12, 2013

muffin

the cutest most adorable huggable squeeshable thing ever. can refer to puppies, boyfriends, best friends, etc...

mario is such a muffin!

by fancy granola December 28, 2005

Muffin

MILF in the making

Yo! check out that muffin!

by Billybarnham June 1, 2011

muffin

Can be used after swear words to make them less severe. The seriousness of the explietive and the sheer niceness of the word "muffin" cancel each other out, and the recipient of the full phrase will know that the explietive is not being used entirely seriously.

You just ate the last ice cream, you complete and utter cuntmuffin!

by Tom May 1, 2005

muffin

someone or something adorable and cute

" awwwww look at that puppy! it is such a muffin!"

by muffinator 5000 March 15, 2009

muffin

Muffins are muffins, there's nuthin like muffins;
You just can't beat muffins, no other will do...
If you don't like muffins then you are a puffin,
So try ENGLISH muffins, 'cos they'll have to do.

Blueberry, Cinnamon, Chocolate or Plain,
Raisin and Apple (the weird ones in Spain),
Muffins are heaven, the Muffin Man's king,
and ITS NOT A RUDE WORD! Its an innocent thing. X)

"Muffins are yummy." "You need a life..."

by The Muffin Mans Wifey September 1, 2006