crasterbate

To masterbate furiously while streams roll down your cheeks

"Dude I hear ben was crasterbating so much after Bridgette said no to him for homecoming" "Yeah dude, I hear he crasterbated around 20 times man"

by A2thlex November 30, 2007

crysterbate

To masturbate and cry simultaneously.

"Dude, you hear Bob's gf broke up with him last night before sex?"

"Yeah, he's probably in a crysterbate session right now."

by Zokwhat April 28, 2014

Crysterbate

1)When you are sad and horny at the same time, you crysterbate. Crying while jerking it.

2)Christerbate same as crysterbate but doing a Jesus Christ pose.

James found out his girlfriend was cheating on him, he locked himself in his room to crysterbate.

by Evan Bahler February 2, 2020

Crysturbate

Depressed masturbating that results in crying from being so lonely.

Richard was so lonely, yet so horny, he would crysturbate himself to sleep

by meggymc October 27, 2017

Crysturbate

Being so depressed with any aspect of your life, normally your love life, that you cry before, during, or after masturbating alone in your room.

After getting turned down on Valentine's day, Greg went home and crysturbated the night away.

by Blind idiot February 15, 2018

Crysterbation

1.Verb- crying whilst in the process of masturbation.

2.Noun- see above

Portrayed accurately in Little Ashes by Robert Pattinson when his gay lover hooks up with the girl he loves while he is in the room (confused yet? Don't be, basically Robert Pattinson is incapable of playing a character that questions his sexuality) (oh by the way, Little Ashes is an accurate portrayl of Salvador Dali's life, soooo as far as I know, Salvador Dali is the only case of crysterbation in mass media. More win for surrealists) "I thought he was simply crying in his room until he ran out of breath and I heard something else; he was clearly crysterbating."

by Salvador Dali win December 23, 2010

Crysterbate

Verb: To Crysterbate

Cry-sterbating is when a guy stands in a corner, crying using his own tears as lube while he jerks off sobbing, nuts into a teaspoon, drinks the nut because he's low on zinc, and then sits in the fetal position rocking back and forth wondering "When the hell did my life get so depressing?" Then he remembers and does it all again. Just like shampoo directions, rinse, wash, and repeat.

Billy: Wheres Dillon?

Josh: He's probably at home cry-sterbating again

Dillon tends to crysterbate instead of masturbating because his life is so fucked up. Plus he's low on zinc.

by Trip Wilson May 30, 2017