De Jesus 

One of the most Bad Ass last names in all of history.

DUDE have you seen this guy's last name before? "De Jesus" what a BAD ASS NAME.

De Jesus by EduardoD January 21, 2009

Raptor Jesus 

Our savior.

Raptor Jesus died for our sins.

Raptor Jesus by Bloodbath 87 March 6, 2009

Having Jesus over for dinner 

Instead of faking a plausible excuse, a person tells an audacious lie in order to make it known that they just don't want to hang out with you, presumably in order to offend you enough that the situation won't occur again.

Jake: Hey man, you wanna go catch a flick at the old drive-thru?

Jim: Nah dude, I'm having Jesus over for dinner.

Jake: Weak!

Having Jesus over for dinner by zekepliskin December 6, 2009

Jacked Jesus 

Jacked Jesus is like Jesus but is short and stronger around the height of 5'3, if he flexes on you, you will disappear into dust in an instant, like being thanosed, he is too strong some people say but they are right!

Jacked Jesus: *Flexes*
You: *Disappears*

Jacked Jesus by The Priest Logan December 10, 2019

Murda Murda Jesus 

An anti-christ phrase used to make over religious people feel very offended. Often accompanied by phrases like "666" and "Catholics, so I gotta murda them!".

The phrases come from a song called Lucifer 9, which features these hidden messages when played in reverse.

AntiChrist - "I'm gonna Murda Murda Jesus!"
Christian - *cries*

Murda Murda Jesus by Valcatz July 19, 2011

fix it jesus 

when someone is doing something so shameful/extra that you need Jesus to fix it for you because it has become too much. or when something foul has happened and only Jesus can help. made famous by Phaedra Parks from the real housewives of Atlanta.

teacher: "I'm assigning you an essay and a project due the day you come back from winter break"
me: "fix it Jesus

or
person #1: "this guy in my class who I've never talked to before just came up to me and told me my mom was a MILF!
person #2: fix it jesus, that is so strange!

fix it jesus by poopemoji January 13, 2016

miracle from the baby Jesus 

Something so wondrous or unlikely of happening that it has to be a miracle from the baby Jesus himself.

Ice-T's wife, Coco has an ass so glorious that is a miracle from the baby Jesus.

Chuck Norris being elected president would be a miracle from the bJesus.

miracle from the baby Jesus by Alyson Clair October 28, 2008