condom

Ice cream.

The condom truck is outside, come get your five dollar bill and don't miss out on your tasty condom!

by Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake April 14, 2025

[condom]

Cheapest prevention of a thousand problems in existence. For just a buck, you can avoid thousands in court costs, child support, medical bills for some nasty STDs, and you KNOW the kid isn't yours!

Condom: No glove, no love. Unless you're dumb enough to want an entirely different(and truly painful)kind of screwing.

by KrimsonSmartass January 13, 2009

condom.

a device used by a dude so that the chick he's fucking doesn't become pregnant, or STI infected.

Girl #1: What'd your mom say about you have sex with your boy last night?
Girl #2: She said. "Alright, make him use a condom."

by yourneighborlyrapist December 15, 2008

Condom Mining

Realizing at some point during or after intercourse that your condom has ejected itself and is now, through repeated ram-rodding, nested itself as far into her vagina as possible, you have no choice but to do the gentlemanly thing and retrieve it -'through whatever means necessary'.

Loser: "What'd you do last night?"

Stud: "I was knocking the back out of Sheila's vaj. When I finally pulled out after a good 30 to 45 seconds of awesome lovemaking, I realized my Magnum had abondoned ship. I was wrist deep in her coochie doing some series condom mining. Bitch owes me big time!"

by orientxp June 3, 2010

condom account

A single-use account, created for the purposes of (a) gaining intimate details on another's social networking page, without the desire of commitment to the site, or (b) achieving a goal which would require the approval of multiple users. Often used with the consent of the other party and/or without explicit non-consent of the hosting site, and most likely used in conjunction with a condom email. Once the user has satisfied his/her desire, the account is discarded.

Is related to a ghost account or sock puppet, in that the user is forging a new identity, but a condom account is solely used as a means of access.

Jill: "Wanna see my wild party pics?"
Jack: "Yes, I would. But since I do not want to be sullied by associating with that social networking site, let me get my condom account on first."
Jill: "Hooray!"

by piralteqnix November 19, 2010

Condom Anxiety

Condom anxiety occurs when a guy is totally ready to go and then has to put on a condom, reminding him of the reasons one uses a condom: "Is she going to get pregnant?"; "Does she have an STD?" This frequently results in immediate loss of arousal and inability to perform. This condition is also prevalent among guys that were raised Catholic and taught that birth control is forbidden, calling to mind the fact that premarital sex is also forbidden and causing them to feel guilty about what they are about to do. See "Guilty Penis Syndrome."

"Dude, I saw you leave the bar with that hot chick... How was it? Did you rock her world?"
"Man, she was so into me and everything was going great until I went to wrap it up... I had a nasty condom anxiety attack and couldn't go through with it."

by Genebeeb October 6, 2009

condom smear

When you throw a used condom at a flat vertical plain and leaves a snail trail of semen as it slides down the object (ie. a wall, a window)

"After fucking some chick in my car I tryed to throw the used condom out the window, but the window was closed hence leaving a huge condom smear on my window."

by Pointy Pouliot December 16, 2007