Crumpet crippler

The act of shitting out the digested remains of a crumpet, placing it on one’s hand, and slapping one in the genitals until they orgasm uncontrollably leaving them paralysed.

Steve, I’m horny. Give me a crumpet crippler.

by Scousebirdcoleen October 10, 2019

rubbish crumpet

Pseudo-british term for the anus, especially in the context of Anilingus.

My dear would you be so kind as to allow lingual stimulation of your rubbish crumpet?

by hbright December 18, 2024

Crumpet stuffer

A derogatory term used to describe the British and their obsession with tea and crumpets.

American: "Here comes the Crumpet stuffer!"

by He8i3 May 4, 2022

crumpet

someone who shits so fucking much

sorry dude one second, i gotta go crumpet.

by neuqxss February 23, 2022

Crumpet snatcher

An extremely offensive British offensive, meaning to steal ones freshly buttered crumpets

"Did you steal my tea?" You're such a crumpet snatcher!"

by Yllom.gollom October 4, 2016

Rolly Crumpet

To take a poo or make stinky chocolate on the ground while waiting in the line at Walt Disney world to ride a ride or see an attraction publicly infront of everyone.

That kid just made a Rolly Crumpet! I guess he was waiting in line too long and couldn’t hold it in anymore .

by 420D-Portkid November 26, 2023

Jacket Crumpet

A burnt breakfast

Aww man I accidentally made a jacket crumpet.

by A ham sandwich April 28, 2022