Crumpet fucker

A slurr to use against the British

Get some braces you crumpet fucker

by Jack sparky October 21, 2023

Crumpeting

When you shove a warm, buttered crumpet up your arsehole.

Last week I caught Bogdan Crumpeting.

by Lord Pervert of Shittingswell November 18, 2023

porn crumpet

Originates from the band name Psychedelic Porn Crumpets. There are two likely definitions:

(a) Describes a pornographic or sexy crumpet; a crumpet that looks very appetizing
(b) A porn star. Crumpet referring to a sexy person (usually a woman)

(a) Hey Jerry can you pass me that porn crumpet?
(b) Mate, is that the porn crumpet from "Revenge of the Tentacles 3"?

by ssflss January 10, 2023

buttery crumpet

When you slab that butter on the crumpet and it melts all the way through to the plate.

That was such a buttery crumpet I licked the plate afterwards.

by anonymous August 18, 2022

Crumpets and tea

Crumpets and tea is a British food, usually eaten for breakfast or afternoon paired with tea often. It is made from flour, milk or water and yeast.

Friend 1: Hey bruv you wanna come over and have some crumpets and tea mate?

Friend 2: what kind of bloody question is that? Of course I do!

by sex minister April 26, 2022

Jacket Crumpet

A burnt breakfast

Aww man I accidentally made a jacket crumpet.

by A ham sandwich April 28, 2022

Crumpet stuffer

A derogatory term used to describe the British and their obsession with tea and crumpets.

American: "Here comes the Crumpet stuffer!"

by He8i3 May 4, 2022