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The Most Amazing Substance In The World

See:Poop

An amazing substance...Can take all 3 forms of matter(solids,liquids,gases(Tee Hee).Can be classified using this "helpful" guide....

1.The Plain Shit
Quick, easy and clean(well as clean as it could be...).
The dream shit

2.The 2nd Wave

Just as you pull your pants up from the first one you realise, to your dismay, that your not finished.

3.The Ghost Turd
The kind where you fell it come out(can be painful)
and there is shit on the toilet paper, but alas!, the bowl is clean

4.The Ass Master
The type of shit that is so huge in size and so mind numbingly painful to squeeze out in feels like your giving birth to it.Usually is so big you have to break it up into little peices before you flush it down

5.The "Oooo Ahhh..." Shit
The shit that is so huge and impressive you have to ring up your friends who will generally make noises of shock and awe

6.The Gas Cloud Shit
The type of shit that smells so bad anyone that walks within 30 metres of your bathroom goes "Damn!",they may also faint...You will need to attack it disenfectant and air-freshner(10+ cans).You will have to continually attack it until the smell goes away(this may take several days)

7.The Mexican Food Shit
See:anal volcano

8.The Corn Shit
No explanation needed

9.The Rea...
Usually caused by a virus.Comes out all mushy and stuff, you have to wipe about 50 times everytime you go and you have to go about 10 times a day.It is also caused by eating taco bell
which brings us to....

10.The Taco Bell
The El Grande of shit
So excruciating it brings a tear to the eye of even the strongest men.Smells similar to The Gas Cloud.Its comes out in a way similar to toothpaste...Can also be slightly gritty also similar to the....

11. ....Crunken Nights Shit....
Pretty much the same as The Taco Bell.Leaves skid marks in the bottom of the toilet.
Comes in two colours:
1.Oh-No-I-Have-Shit-Marks-On-My-Undies Brown
2.Fuck-My-Head-Hurts-Like-Fuck green
3.Holy-Fuck-It's-Red Red
and in extreme cases....
4.*complete silence* Blue/Purple

12.Cocoa Puff
You squeeze and squeeze, it taunts you, you fight back,control your muscles,it may need vocal assistance...
After you get up you expect to see a lincoln log, but alas!
It's a cocoa puff, it sits there...Taunting you...

13.The Posh Turd
Has no odour.

14.The Hanging Soldier
A shit that sort of just hangs there, if a shake or two doesn't make it come loose use a bit of toilet paper to push it away.

15.Liquidity(The Shampoo Shit)
The kind where it squirts out like shampoo and takes 100 wipes to dry/clean

16.Arse Orchestra
The type of shit where all that comes out is gas, usually loud enough to make everyone in the house giggle.

17.The OMFG-Why-Can't-I-Poop Poop
Similar effect of Arse Orchestra
You just keep pushing and pushing to no avail...identical to the Ghost Turd, except when you wipe there is nothing there

And that is why it is the most amazing substance in the world(I didn't really prove that but IDC)
If you read all of that...You are a fucktard
Btw "The Most Amazing Substance In The World".
by Fucktarded Scarecrow July 31, 2009
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Subsidize

Paying part of the cost of producing (something) to reduce prices for the buyer.
I am going to stop paying my taxes so that the government doesn't subsidize my money towards constructing highways, which would benefit one part of the population at the cost of another.
by ThE CoLLeGeBoArD October 13, 2018
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subsistence

1. Surviving on the bare minimum of what you need to live.

2. An active RuneScape clan with well over a hundred members and 35+ level 100's.
I'm barely subsisting on these supplies we have here...

Hey look, it's Clan Subsistence! They're going to destroy us in a clan war!
by ygfbv April 22, 2011
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Subsaud

He tried to jump across the border but fell, subsaud.
by Papa Leykums March 1, 2009
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subservience

willingness to obey others unquestioningly
The subservience trainee moved up.
by Art Geek (^ᗜ^) October 18, 2017
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i reject your reality and substitute it with my own

a one liner comeback that basically means that you're right and the other person is wrong. the 'realities' being the varying opinions in the argument/conversation

i reject your reality and substitute it with my own (i refuse to accept that you are right so i will change your point to mine)
teacher: i told you yesterday what the homework was. why isnt it done
student: you didnt tell me, therefore i do not know
teacher: why has everyone else done it then?
student: i reject your reality and substitute it with my own ;)
teacher: /mindfuck
by llamasareoverrated August 13, 2011
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A "Greg Scott" Substitution

Whilst playing Fifa online, pretending to make a substitution then quitting due to being one or more goals behind.
I was beating him 1-0 with 5 minutes left to go and he made "A "Greg Scott" Substitution"
by SomeRangersFan April 11, 2009
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