Lacerate

To cut or rip at something, with a sharp weapon or claws. For other ways to mutilate people, see fustigate.

"He looked at me funny, so I lacerated his intestines"

by John Q Moron May 5, 2004

sub-literate

The term pertains to someone unable to use language correctly. The word implies that someone cannot spell, speak, form sentences, or in any way converse at a level at or equal to that of Republican vice-presidential candidates.

"Man, why was ridiculous spelled wrong in that email?"

"Probably because Eric is sub-literate."

by TheCox500 January 29, 2009

Alternate Universe

A parallel existence in which events may unfold differently and particles are antimatter and so forth. A subset of the multiverse.

Amply illustrated in this Youtube conversation.

Dude 1: I shudder to think that there may be an alternate universe out there in which McCain-Palin won the elections! Wait, she could be PRESIDENT in this one!

Dude 2: There is such a universe. In that universe Gore and Lieberman won. Gore was killed by an Iraqi-Iranian-Pakistani Terrorist while he was looking out a window in the Twin Towers. President Lieberman made a tearful speech declaring Gore a martyr. He the declared World War on Islam and bombed Egypt.

The US is also bankrupt in that reality.

by Vamavid November 20, 2009

Alternate Facts

Despite popular belief, an alternative fact is not a lie, but a fact derived in an alternate reality or parallel universe. These facts are often hard to verify as all data and analysis doesn't leave the alternate reality or universe where it was derived. Furthermore most people are not able to access the alternate reality or universe, as it requires special abilities reserved for those with a wonton disregard for logic, and zero cognitive dissonance.

Trump: Hey Pence, Nickelback is the best selling band of all time! We need to book them for the inauguration.
Pence: Save your alternate facts for the media and twitter.

by Taco Corp January 23, 2017

Alternate Google

Many versions of www.google.com.

poogle, kizoogle, and froogle are all Alternate Googles.

by flclimax1 November 24, 2007

Alternate BH-ing

Boob harassment. The act of intently observing a pair of boobs. It's BH-ing, but with boobs instead of ass.

A bitch is walking down the hall, better do some alternate BH-ing.

by The BH-ing Club April 25, 2013

literate

1) A person possessing reading and writing skills that remain acceptable by the standards of the English language.
2) A member belonging to the nearly unknown society of persons able to string a sentence together without the addition of such terms including ur, hott, omg, lolz, wft, and so forth...

Literate: Did you see that girl knock out the math teacher?

Non-Literate: omg did u see tha mofo slung that fag in his fuckin ballz??

(Grammar error fixed by CPU Killer)

by CPU Killer January 31, 2005