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ballast shovelling

This is where a gentleman is having relations with a lady who is so large that he can't see what he's doing.
Julie was so fat that I was just ballast shovelling!
by Jinny the pig December 31, 2013
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drop ballast

to have a movement of one's bowels; to take a shit (nautical in origin).
Captain Pete grabbed a newspaper and headed for the shithouse. It was obvious he was going to cop a squat and drop ballast.
by Blenderhead1991 May 13, 2009
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slag ballast

Ostentatious jewellery which sparkles so much you can't see it's true, low, value...
by Anonymous August 7, 2003
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blow ballast

"Excuse me chaps, I need to blow ballast."
by Andy June 19, 2006
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empty my ballast tank

When said by a woman, to urinate.
I'm gonna go empty my ballast tank.
by K. Isaacson April 21, 2007
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Screaming Ballast

A phrase to describe a wife or girlfriend who doesn't like being driven around at high speed, berates your driving or generally gets scared in the passenger seat.
"Went for a blast around the country lanes, would have been more fun without the Screaming Ballast nagging me too slow down...."
by Puffinchops6618 January 8, 2021
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Ballistic Prose

Words and phrases specifically manufactured/defined in order to mislead careless, irresponsible and deceptive journalists/writers.

{An innovative, percussive and aggressive method/style of writing wherein the author intentionally creates a word/phrase and a definition for the word/phrase as a weaponized literary instrument, objectively targeting and penetrating conventional thinking, culturally imposed dogmatic norms and multi-layered veils of psychosocially nurtured concepts. Ballistic Prose is a baiting tactic aimed in the direction of reckless, quasi-intellectual journalism with the supreme achievement occuring when journalists utilize such manufactured, Ballistic Prose words/phrases as credible terms, descriptors and characterizations as part of a legitimate literary composition, thus signifying the infiltration of artificially modernized etymology and its manifestation as an extension of an elaborate ruse}.
1. 'Seismic Aqueous Waveform S.A.W.' is an example of a ballistic prose characterization for a ridiculously large wave. There is no such thing as a S.A.W.

2. "Dude, NBC just referred to the most recent ocean wave surge as a 'Seismic Aqueous Waveform'. Do they have any clue that there is no such thing as a Seismic Aqueous Waveform? Lol!"

3. {Hambone reads and replies to one of D Dog's recent definitions on UD} "D Dog, your definitions are such a lively form of 'Ballistic Prose!" {D Dog replies} "Hambone, you just invented the term to describe this style off writing = Ballistic Prose."
by Charitable Disguise January 3, 2020
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