Televangelist's spiel with minimal bullshit:
Are you lost on the path of righteousness? Do you believe you have failed yourself and others? God forgives you for fucking up your life. Now all I need is a few thousand dollars of your hard earned money, which you don't have to spend right now but in your spare time, so that your sins are square with the Lord.
Are you lost on the path of righteousness? Do you believe you have failed yourself and others? God forgives you for fucking up your life. Now all I need is a few thousand dollars of your hard earned money, which you don't have to spend right now but in your spare time, so that your sins are square with the Lord.
by T Hizzle June 5, 2005
Get the televangelist mug.A type of politician who strives to present himself to the public in a perfectly coiffed family-man package as he deftly peppers his dogmatic and craftily laundered hate with lots of God-speak.
Ron DeSantis is the the most highly rated televangelist politician at this point in time; stay tuned to this fake-Jesus devotee.
by Dr Bunnygirl March 5, 2023
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Christian TV ads advertising salvation for the low price of $39.95 per-month (plus $19.95 postage and handling).
See also evangelism
See also evangelism
Televangelism: "Send me money or you're all going to hell. Amen!"
Jesus save me *from your deciples*
Jesus save me *from your deciples*
by Eloise January 9, 2006
Get the televangelism mug.Someone who believes that greed, war, torture, Big Business, and depriving people of freedom are examples of following Jesus' commandment to "love your neighbor as yourself." Sometimes they place greater value on the Constitution of the United States than the Bible, and use it as an excuse for patriotism (a form of idolatry) and cutting government programs which help the poor. They claim they believe in a literal interpretation of the Bible, yet they believe in "the Rapture," which is not a very literal interpretation. Often, they think they can "rush" the Second Coming of Christ by promoting war in the Middle East.
I saw this televangelist on TV, who said that bombing the Middle East was God's will, and that sending him money will save me from my sins.
by RedBlade7 March 30, 2008
Get the televangelist mug.a term used to describe a gay individual from southern India. Often times used in villages or rural areas.
by Condomman April 12, 2010
Get the telefaggot mug.Unlike Truman Show Delusion sufferers who see themselves as being the unwitting main character in a reality TV show, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder sufferers see their life as being full-blown scripted, expensive serialised drama TV Series. They frame each year of their life as being a 'season', each week roughly equating to a single 'episode' of their show.
The sufferer twists known facts and does mental gymnastics to shoehorn their mundane lives into some form of 'season arc' for their character.
They know full well that they aren't really in a TV show. - they just desperately want to be.
Ultimately, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder is just a tactic employed by the miserable to deny reality - those who know deep down that the only way their life can have meaning is not through art or expression, giving and charity, a relationship with God but instead by forcibly contextualising everything as being a carefully scripted, story-boarded and rehearsed piece of fiction to be consumed by only the sufferer themselves.
The sufferer inevitably commits suicide or dies in their 'series finale' - Whether their TV Series achieved excellence and a satisfactory conclusion (Breaking Bad), was cancelled before its time and fondly remembered (Party Down), went seasons too long and became a shadow of itself (The Simpsons), (Dexter) can only be determined by the dead sufferer's friends and family at the funeral.
The sufferer twists known facts and does mental gymnastics to shoehorn their mundane lives into some form of 'season arc' for their character.
They know full well that they aren't really in a TV show. - they just desperately want to be.
Ultimately, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder is just a tactic employed by the miserable to deny reality - those who know deep down that the only way their life can have meaning is not through art or expression, giving and charity, a relationship with God but instead by forcibly contextualising everything as being a carefully scripted, story-boarded and rehearsed piece of fiction to be consumed by only the sufferer themselves.
The sufferer inevitably commits suicide or dies in their 'series finale' - Whether their TV Series achieved excellence and a satisfactory conclusion (Breaking Bad), was cancelled before its time and fondly remembered (Party Down), went seasons too long and became a shadow of itself (The Simpsons), (Dexter) can only be determined by the dead sufferer's friends and family at the funeral.
Q; "What's wrong with Caleb? He said he hadn't seen me since 'Season 2', and that he thought I'd been written out, whatever that means?
A: "Dude yeah he's got Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder' - just nod and smile. He'll kill himself if he thinks his show might be getting cancelled or resorting to cheap plot twists"
A: "Dude yeah he's got Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder' - just nod and smile. He'll kill himself if he thinks his show might be getting cancelled or resorting to cheap plot twists"
by J-Lime August 5, 2016
Get the Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder mug.1. A preening, posing, drawling, shouting clown in a purple suit and a cowboy hat whose antics cause millions of people to hate Jesus Christ.
2. A bellowing, preening, money-grubbing hypocrite stereotyped by liberals as the typical Christian.
2. A bellowing, preening, money-grubbing hypocrite stereotyped by liberals as the typical Christian.
If the Lord Jesus Christ walked into the room, the televangelist would stop shouting, drawling, and grinning through his teeth, and fall on his face in silence.
by Bumkicker Slade May 7, 2005
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